


Let's Get It

by sansonaxy



Category: BLACKPINK (Band), GOT7, Monsta X (Band), Red Velvet (K-pop Band), SEVENTEEN (Band), Stray Kids (Band), TWICE (Band), 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe - Crack, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Attempt at Humor, Crack, F/F, Humor, M/M, group chats galore, more couples to be added in the future maybe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-22
Updated: 2019-03-12
Packaged: 2019-07-01 06:47:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 34,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15768762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sansonaxy/pseuds/sansonaxy
Summary: The International School of Performing Arts is the perfect battleground for students to prove themselves and cultivate their skills for their future as entertainers.OrStick a bunch of artistic weird kids together and expect life-long friendships, heartbreak, and absolute chaos.





	1. major misunderstandings

**Author's Note:**

> I'm attempting something and I had fun with it~

** ‘97 ftw **

_doubleb: us ‘97 liners are superior beings no printer just FAX_

_gyeom: whO TAUGHT YOU THAT JSJAKAJK_

_doubleb: WHO TAUGHT YOU KEYBOARD SMASH omg gaaaaaayyy_

_kookie: you literally cannot talk bambam_

_lalalalisa: mr. oooh felix’s freckles look so UWU_

_chris: wtf sTAY AWAY FROM MY AUSTRALIAN SON_

_rosie: OUR Australian son #AussieGANG_

_the8: he’s a literal baby bambam wtf_

_doubleb: YOU GUYS ARE THE ONES MAKING IT WEIRD I JUST THOUGHT HIS FRECKLES WERE CUTE_

_gyu: wow i had no idea you were pining after chans son_

_ballermina: for shame_

_doubleb: e tu Mina?!?!_

_actualgoddess: he is a ‘00 liner wow i had no idea you were into younger men_

_doubleb: E TU JIHYO WHY_

_actualgoddess: for wiping your greasy hands all over my hw_

_doubleb: THAT WAS SEOKMIN WTF_

_dokyeom: it was me sorry_

_actualgoddess: oh.....whoops_

_doubleb: i take it back you are all the worst_

_rosie: on to more important things who has B lunch today and can lend me money for extra fries_

>>

“Yah, Park Chaeyoung!” 

“Huh? Sorry unnie.”

“You wanted to be partners because of the so called Aussie gang but you haven’t even practiced your lines yet,” Jennie huffed.

“Aussie gang is a thing! There are a lot of us here! And don’t worry I love Ed Sheehan this’ll be easy!” Chaeyoung assured. 

“There are literally only like four of us from Australia and we have to present in two days.”

“Exactly, so we gotta stick together! And stop worrying we’ve got this you’re good at everything and I’ve been practicing at home.”

Jennie just rolled her eyes. 

Sometimes she regretted picking this particular vocal class. She thought experiencing a more folksy indie type of music scene would help her out vocally, and it did but the only person she was close-ish to was Chaeyoung but the girl was a little scattered.

She could sing like angel, but her self-proclaimed motto was ‘eat happily and wing it and sing it’ which didn’t really reassure Jennie when it came to projects but they hadn’t failed yet so she couldn’t really complain but she was going to anyways. 

“Just make sure you actually practice and aren’t just sitting at home eating another tub of ice cream.”

“First of all, it was ONE time. Second of all, I ate it with Lisa. THIRD OF ALL, it’s lunch time so bye!”

Chaeyoung was already gathering her things when the bell rang and dashed out. Minghao could protest the inorganic, processed school lunch all he wanted but Chaeyoung lived for the spicy french fries.

>>

“I can’t believe you exposed me like that you traitor.”

“You’re the one pining after ‘00 liners.”

“I WAS NOT YOU-“

“Who has money for Chaeyoung this time I literally have like a single dollar to my name and I need that for dinner.” 

It was lunch time and the famed ‘97 liners where gathered at their usual table, save for Chaeyoung who was still in line and Mingyu, Seokmin, and Minghao who had different lunch times.

“Wow, that’s so sad.” Mina said with no actual remorse. “Isn’t she your best friend Lisa?”

“I literally have like a dollar fifty in my bank account right now I had to call and tell them I’m aware I’m below the limit.”

“I literally just saw you buy a new makeup palette on your phone last period,” Yugyeom said.

“Which, coincidentally is the reason I don’t have money, I admit, but that’s besides the point because-“

“Lisa is FAKE,” BamBam yelled, laughing. 

“Disappointed but not surprised.” Jihyo shook her head. 

“WHATS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN-“

“Guys!” Chaeyoung whined, plopping down next to Lisa. “The lunch lady said she won’t give me extras anymore because I’ll start getting fat!”

“What the hell,” Lisa said, shocked and hugging her best friend. 

Jungkook frowned. “That’s so rude.”

“She’s just mad she’s not as cute as you,” Mina assured and Jihyo echoed her, but Chaeyoung sniffled.

“You don’t even ask for extras everyday that’s so messed up,” Yugyeom pouted. 

“Here take my lunch, it’s gross today anyways. That lady should be glad someone enjoys her food in the first place don’t listen to her.” BamBam passed his tray to the girl. 

“Are you sure?” She asked. “I don’t wanna take it if you’re actually gonna eat it the french fries are really good! They remind me a lot of the ones back home!”

“We must have really different homes.”

“That was shady as hell dude,” Jungkook laughed, but Chaeyoung was already eating.

“Speaking of, where’s your fellow Aussie?” BamBam asked.

Chaeyoung shrugged. “He said he was going to see someone about something.”

>>

“More.”

“What? Are you sure?”

“I’m sure Chan, trust me.”

“I don’t want to hurt you...”

“You won’t I’ve done this a thousand times.”

“Okay...” He pushed down and almost squeals when the girl beneath him let’s out a sigh at the crack of her spine. 

“Noona, oh my god I can’t do this anymore.”

“I thought you were serious about this.“

“I was but your back just cracked and it sounded so gross and I don’t know how much more I can take.”

“You’re not the one being stretched out.”

“Yeah but I’m the one pushing you! And I can feel and hear everything, it’s weird!” 

“What’s weird is this conversation, do you have any idea what it sounds like from behind this door?” 

Chan does squeal this time, jumping back from the girl at his feet. 

“Woojin?! What the hell, don’t do that!” 

Woojin chuckles. “Hello Momo-noona.” He waves at the girl whos on the floor next to Chan, her legs spread wide and body pressed against the floor to stretch herself out.

Hirai Momo. One of many Japanese transfer students apart of the schools special program for scouting talent overseas. 

And talented she was. 

Momo has been dancing since she three or four and was considered one of the best dancers in the school.

“Ew, ew, stop I just heard your back crack again noona, stop!”

“What are you even doing here if you can’t handle stretching?” Woojin asks, embarrassed for his squeamish friend.

“I’m helping him with a routine for the upcoming showcase,” Momo says from the floor. “I just needed help stretching and I told him we’d see what we can come up with.”

“The showcase isn’t for another five months Chan.” 

“I know but Felix gave me this great idea!” 

“The kid with the freckles?”

>>

** everything before 1998 was a mistake **

_ilikedark: i still don’t get the name_

_fixitfelix: bc minho-hyung was 1998 and the rest of us are ‘99-‘00_

_seungseung: so everything before minho-hyung is a mistake_

_yaknow: obviously i was the last good gift to this world_

_hanhan: if you say so_

_yaknow: bitCH_

_I.N: he’s just mad you wouldn’t share at lunch hyung_

_hyunjinyoung: e x p o s e d_

_hanhan: says the Park Jinyoung fanboy_

_I.N: r o a s t e d_

_hyunjinyoung: shut up yours is stupid too it’s just letters_

_ilikedark: aren’t all names just letters tho??_

_I.N: d o u b l e r o a s t_

_hyunjinyoung: STFU_

_yaknow: LANGUAGE_

_seungseung: how rude hyunjinnie_

_fixitfelix: pls stop i messaged to see if you guys would be ok with meeting up this weekend?_

_yaknow: kinda last minute felix_

_seungseung: hyung....it’s thursday...._

_yaknow: i’m a very busy man_

_hanhan: i tried video calling you the other day and you told me to fuck off bc you were eating ice cream and Scandal was getting good_

_I.N: E X P O S E D_

_yaknow: IS THAT ALL YOU KNOW HOW TO SAY JEONGIN_

_hyunjinyoung: pretty much he hasn’t developed a proper meme palette yet_

_ilikedark: that’s the worst thing i’ve ever read get out_

_fixitfelix: so yes??_

_I.N: yeah im free_

_hyunjinyoung: me too_

_ilikedark: i guess_

_seungseung: no problem yeah_

_hanhan: yup_

_yaknow: .....i’ll clear my schedule for you_

_felixthecat: <3 <3 <3_

_I.N: is it about the music thing you’ve been talking about hyung?_

_fixitfelix: yup, we might finally get a chance to do something real!!!! something like our seniors!!!_

>>

** oldies but GOLDIES **

_leeminmin: guys...do you ever feel really old?_

_suga: you literally named our chat oldies but goldies_

_sharkboi: and you literally tried getting a senior discount at a buffet the other day_

_markiepooh: you yelled at some ‘00 liners bc they were being ‘hooligans’_

_worldwidehansome: i told you we should’ve named the chat fine like wine but nooooooo_

_leeminmin: wow ok i just came for some SYMPATHY and i get attacked? my heart can’t handle this_

_wonho: maybe you feel old bc you keep acting like an 80yo grandma_

_anactualbear : which is funny bc your actually a 4yo_

_leeminmin: if i die of heartbreak i’m suing all of you_

_irene: i’m literally older than all of you I COULD BE YOUR GRANDMOTHER_

_leeminmin: pardon my french noona but BITCH WHERE_

_anactualbear: wow rude_

_wonho: no manners_

_sharkboi: no respect for his elders_

_worldwidehansome: noona can you believe this_

_markiepooh: kick him out noona_

_suga: he’s jealous of you noona_

_leeminmin: I HATE ALL OF YOU_

_irene: ....no comment_

>>

“Unnie...not that I don’t enjoy being your partner but why are you in this class again?”

Why was she in this class? She had already taken a mandatory hip hop class so she really didn’t see the point of dumping her in another one. 

“There was an error in the computers and instead of being an aid I got put in here.” Joohyun sighed. “Why are you in here Seulgi?”

The girl shrugged. “My trainer saw I had a space in my schedule so she said I should specifically take a rapping class to improve my rhythm.” 

Truth be told, Seulgi only rapped when absolutely necessary. She was okay at it, in that she could do it but not come up with it. She didn’t really care for talking, much preferred the feelings she managed to radiate and messages she conveyed through dance. Talking wasn’t fun and stringing catchy lyrical beats with complex succinct sentences was even worse, rapping was just too much of a hassle when she knew she could get her point across better with her movements. 

“Why didn’t they just change it?”

“The counselor was supposedly ‘swamped’ with course change requests and it was too late.”

“Well good thing you have the golden oldies to distract you?” Seulgi offered. “What are you guys talking about now?”

“Minhyuk thinks he’s getting old.”

Seulgi laughed. “Wasn’t he the one who named the chat?”

“Yeah, they started teasing him and calling him a grandma, so I told him I’m even older and could be his grandmother and he said bitch where.”

Seulgi was giggling, doubled over and unaware of the looks the other groups were giving them, particularly the big groups of boys. Irene just gave them all a look, staring back. Good thing people told her she was intimidating because it actually worked and they turned away looking embarrassed. 

It was no secret that rapping was male-dominated, no matter where you went. There were only two rap-focused classes and in both there were only a handful of female students, despite the fact that one of the classes was taught by a female instructor. In Joohyun’s class alone there were only two other girls besides her and Seulgi and the other two girls were a lot younger. 

“How did you respond to that?” Seulgi asked, still chuckling.

“I just said no comment. I’m definitely messing with him when I see him though.”

>>

“Fuck, oh my god I’m going to burst into literal flames.”

“What? Shut up you’re exaggerating.”

“I told you guys not to look over there!”

“She was laughing! I heard noise so I look, natural human response!”

“I can’t believe the actual god of the school just death stared us.”

“She did not death stare us Mingyu, stop it.”

“Cheol, I don’t know where you were looking, but she definitely did.”

“Hyung stop,” Seungcheol said, exasperated. Namjoon and Mingyu were right, but he was really trying to not panic. Bae freaking Joohyun, everyone’s crush and role model had just given them her infamous death look for staring at her friend. 

“I don’t know how Mingyu was gonna burst into flames, that was the iciest death stare in the whole universe, I still have goosebumps!” Hoseok said, shivering. 

“I know,” Namjoon said, wincing. “Shush though not too loud.”

“I really hope we don’t have a target on our backs after this,” Jooheon says from his spot next to a still shivering Hoseok. 

“That’s what you all get for being nosy,” Changkyun hisses from across the table, glancing at Seulgi and Joohyun. 

“You were already looking up liar!” Jooheon protested. 

“I was already facing that way, so I couldn’t just turn away that’d be even worse!”

“Ahh! Stop!” Seungcheol says, trying to calm the two. One girl really shouldn’t be having this kind of effect on them, or anyone, but Bae Joohyun, better known by her stage name, Irene, was something else. 

She hadn’t even graduated yet, but she’d been involved in plenty of modeling gigs, small acting roles, and even a couple of music videos as a dancer or actress. Coupled with the fact that she was breathtakingly beautiful to anyone with eyes, it’s easy to see how intimidating she could be. 

Not to mention she had somehow amassed a cult following in and out of school, guys and girls alike adored her, teachers and students, everyone just loved her and although people close to her claim she’s really not that scary, outsiders can’t get past her quiet pensive demeanor. 

“I’m more worried she was left with the wrong impression,” Namjoon says, distressed. “I don’t want her to think we don’t like her or her friend or worse, that we don’t want them in the class because we’re sexist or something.” 

“Oh my god don’t even tell me that Namjoon-hyung, why would you say that I’d rather have thought she just thought we were staring at her friend because she was pretty or something,” Mingyu moaned, banging his head on the table.

“Mingyu you are literally a giant what’s wrong with you?”

“Yeah, I’m sure you can take her,” Jooheon teased, although he was also starting to worry. 

“I would literally rather become a puddle than ever face her or her friend.”

>>

“Ah, Seulgi-unnie’s laugh is so cute, no?” Dahyun mused. 

Her friend nodded. “Yeah, it’s a cute little giggle. She’s kinda like a teddy bear.” 

“That’s weird but it fits.”

“That sounds like a good lyric kinda? Maybe switch the wording a bit?”

They’d been going at it for most of the class period, but the two girls hadn’t been able to come up with anything they thought was good enough. Dahyun hadn’t originally been interested in rapping, simply because she’d been told her perfect pitch would be ideal for singing, but she loved challenges so she enrolled in the class with Chaeyoung. 

Chaeyoung meanwhile, enjoyed the genre and was okay with taking the mandatory class, but she hadn’t expected it to be such a challenge. So far they’d been spared the trouble of creating any complex beats (although some people did that part of the project too), but even just weaving words together was troublesome especially because she didn’t want to end up copying or overusing a concept or phrase. 

She sighed. “Is it lunch time yet? I want to eat with Jennie-unnie already.”

“We don’t have the same lunch, remember? She’s texting us right now about how miserable she is.”

 

** chaehyunjenoo**

 

_jenjen: pls tell me we get to eat together tomorrow_

_chichoochoo: haha you lonely without us?_

_memequeen: unnie misses us aww <3_

_chayyyee: aww we miss you too unnie!!_

_jenjen: stop being gross i’m just bored i’ve looked through my lines like 12 times already_

_memequeen: where are you sitting unnie?_

_jenjen: the same spot but it’s just empty without you fools_

_chayyyee: awww unnie <3_

_chichoochoo: everyone let’s savor this moment_

_jenjen: stop_

_memequeen: why don’t you sit with the other chaeyoung?_

_chayyyee: WHAT OTHER CHAEYOUNG_

_chichoochoo: the one she’s cheating on you with_

_memequeen: GASP_

_jenjen: what no stop it_

_chayyyee: I CANT BELIEVE THIS I GAVE YOU THE BEST 3 MINUTES OF MY LIFE JENNIE KIM_

_memequeen: THE BETRAYAL_

_chichoochoo: THE DISRESPECT_

_chayyyee: i can’t believe this......_

_jenjen: i change my mind the table is fine without you idiots_

_chichoochoo: don’t let her use the table to distract you REAL CHAEYOUNG_

_memequeen: THE ORIGINAL_

_jenjen: well guess what plot twist i am cheating on all of you and it’s with this table the table and i are happily married  
now without all of you to bother us so suck on that hoes_

_chayyyee: as long as it isn’t the other Chaeyoung idc you can marry a chair for all I care_

_chichoochoo: who even is the other chaeyoung? lol_

_jenjen: i hate you you started this and don’t even know who she is_

_memequeen: hahaha she’s unnie’s partner in her indie music class for hippies or whatever it is_

_jenjen: it’s not for hippies shut up aren’t you in class?_

_chayyyee: yeah we’re bored too tho we can’t come up with any lyrics rn_

_chichoochoo: i’m not i’m hiding out in the bathroom because math is boring_

_memequeen: you’re my role model unnie_

_chayyyee: an inspiration to women everywhere_

_jenjen: go back to class you walnut_

_chichoochoo: fine_

>>

“Taehyung, Jimin, Youngjae where is your partner?” 

“She’s in the bathroom still, ma’am.” Jimin replies.

The teacher sighed. “Well she better hurry it on up, she’s missed most of class.”

“She will ma’am,” Taehyung says. It’s exactly what she wanted, although he wished she didn’t have to leave right before they were put together in groups to solve some overly-complicated equations.

Taehyung didn’t really understand why Jisoo would randomly leave during classes. The only class she never left in the middle of was lunch, if you could even call it a class, and actually when he thought about it she did move around a lot during lunch too. She was really lucky everyone liked her, even those who didn’t know her recognized her as a friendly face.

She was weird though. People talk about 4D personalities like they’re cute and endearing but Jisoo is just weird and loud sometimes. The first time he saw her she was trying to balance a water bottle on each shoulder and it worked until the infamous Youngjae cackle made her spill it all over the floor. Luckily the teacher liked her and forced Youngjae to clean it with her and thus a loud cackling 4D antics friendship bloomed. 

“Hyung, tell her to come back I don’t understand any of this and she was the only one of us who took notes,” Youngjae whines.

“Hey! I took notes too!”

“GOOD notes Kim Taehyung, not notes where half of the paper is doodling puppies,” Jimin says pointedly.

“You know what-“

 

** mAtH iS fOr CHuMps **

_chichoochoo: taehyung oppa is the lesson almost done? the bathroom is getting boring too_

_taetae: you’re in the bathroom?_

_chimchim: i thought you at least abandoned us to skip somewhere fun_

_actualsunshine: yeah what the heck come help us with this it’s so hard_

_chichoochoo: is the lesson almost done?_

_taetae: yeah we’re in our group rn but none of us know what to do_

_chimchim: bc you’re the only one who took good notes_

_actualsunshine: yeah taehyung-hyung just drew a bunch puppies on his papers_

_taetae: i’m sorry i wasn’t aware i was in presence of puppy haters what did puppies ever do to you_

_actualsunshine: first of all, that’s offensive of you to even say hyung you know i love my daughter second of all i love puppies how dare u_

_chichoochoo: yeah don’t come for my god daughters father you snake_

_chimchim: we’re literally sitting right next to each other wtf just look at each other_

_taetae: no_

_actualsunshine: no_

_chichoochoo: no_

_chimchim: jisoo wtf just pls come back and do this stuff so we can go to lunch already_

_chichoochoo: fine fine i’m coming someone took a horrible dump in here anyway knowing gosh darn well i was in here trying to avoid the horror that is math class_

_actualsunshine: ewww_

_chimchim: wow the audacity_

_taetae: speak normally what the fuck is gosh darn_

_chichoochoo: i have vocal training with the youngsters so the teacher said i have to stop cursing or she’ll make me jog around the room and do scales all period_

_actualsunshine: that is cruel and unusual wtf_

_chimchim: yeah that’s kinda extreme can’t you report that?_

_chichoochoo: the vocal instructor is my great aunt so no_

_taetae: rest in pieces kim jisoo_

_chichoochoo: it’s not my fault i’m with a bunch of babies!!!_

_actualsunshine: jisoo they’re not that young i’ve talked to some of them_

_chichoochoo: if you’re ‘98 and below you’re automatically a baby_

_taetae: that’s probably how jinyoung-hyung sees you_

_chimchim: who’s that?_

_taetae: the really hot guy who she did that big hosting thing with_

_chichoochoo: it was just hosting a local talent show and yeah he’s handsome af_

_chimchim: OHHHH is he the one who hangs out with Jaebum-hyung?_

_actualsunshine: you misspelled that jimin_

_chimchim: i didn’t?_

_actualsunshine: you meant to say Jaebum the finest man on the actual planet life and heart ruiner_

_taetae: your gay is showing youngjae_

_actualsunshine: well your asshole is showing rude_

_chichoochoo: ASHJKAGA THAT COULD HAVE BEEN WORDED BETTER YOUNGJAE_

_actualsunshine: WELL NOW YOUR GAY IS SHOWING SO SHUT UP_

_chichoochoo: oh? i wasn’t aware it was ever hidden?_

_taetae: jimin is in tears rn and the teacher just yelled at us hurry up and come back jisoo and youngjae we’ve told you a million times JUST ASK HIM OUT_

_actualsunshine: counter offer how bout i don’t?_

_chichoochoo: why not i mean you’re cute i can get jinyoung oppa to talk to him_

_actualsunshine: HOW ABOUT YOU DONT_

_taetae: you two are gonna be the reason we get extra hw if Jimin doesn’t stop laughing_

_actualsunshine: Jaebum-hyung is just so UGH i’ll stick with admiring from afar he’s way too cool_

>>

“Where the fuck do you connect all of this?”

“Its labeled for a reason hyung...”

“Well hyung is just here because I’d rather yell at this than at Jackson for trying to kiss me for the millionth time.”

“Are you sure you two aren’t dating?”

“God no don’t even say that Hansol, he’s the clingiest person ever.”

“Says the one who pines after ‘the actual sun’ and gets jealous when other people get too close.” 

Jaebum blushed. “Shut up Jihoon, you’re just mad you need Hyungwon’s long ass legs for this.”

Jihoon glared. He was indeed short and taking advantage of Hyungwon’s ‘long ass legs’ to connect all the music making equipment but no one was dumb enough to comment about his stature knowing full and well it didn’t stop him from fighting a man. 

“Hansol aren’t you friends with Kim Taehyung?” 

The brunette shook his head, grinning. “No, but Seungkwan is and and Kim Taehyung is friends with Youngjae.”

“Get me his number.”

“Don’t you dare Jihoon-“

“Please stop you’re all giving me a headache,” Hyungwon groans, fiddling with the connections. “You are the worst Jihoon.”

“Thank you,” he smirks. “Hansol I’m serious though I need Youngjae’s number I need his voice.”

“I’ll ask Seungkwan-“

“What the hell Jihoon NO I thought we were picking the singers together,” Jaebum protests.

If Jaebum knew taking this mandatory producers class was going to be even worse the second time around, he’d have just stuck to dance with Jinyoung and Jackson. At least they only ever bluffed about exposing his crush on the actual sunlight of this world Choi Youngjae. 

He didn’t really know when he started liking the boy, but once he started he couldn’t control it. The boys cackling laugh was infectious and endearing, he had the fluffiest dark brown hair ever that Jaebum just wanted to run his fingers through and play with, and his smile was always wide and unapologetic and made Jaebum feel like he was literally being assaulted by gentle spring day. Simply  
put, he was whipped but couldn’t even imagine confessing to the boy. 

Jihoon shrugged. “I’ve had my eye on him since before we even started the project, his voice is unique and I like the way it sounds, sorry.”

“Can I pick Seungkwan?” Hansol asks. “He is literally Mariah Carrey, you’ve heard him.”

“Hmm, maybe, we’ll see how their voices sound together.”

“All of you stop getting ahead of yourselves, we’re barely on day three of this project,” Hyungwon says, still messing with a few wires. 

“Yeah, so find another person Jihoon.”

“Yeah no, I like Youngjae and getting to see you squirm is just a plus.” 

Jihoon is really a devil

>>

** triple JX3 **

 

_JB: is it wrong of me to say i want to stick lee jihoon in a trash can? is that short-phobic am i committing a hate crime?_

_park gae: wtf are you even talking about_

_wang gae: whos lee jihoon? is he really that short?_

_park gae: he’s in Jaebum’s music production class and kind of??_

_wang gae: why do you want to stick him in a trash can hyung?_

_JB: bc he wants to use Youngjae as a singer for our project_

_park gae: bitch i thought it was something important_

_wang gae: this is an opportunity!!! get your man hyung!!!!_

_JB: evERYONE THINKS WE’RE DATING JACKSON SO NO I CANT GET A MAN_

_wang gae: it’s not my fault people take handholding so seriously_

_park gae: you literally ran around the cafeteria trying to kiss him...._

_wang gae: PLATONIC KISSES ARE CUTE YOU GUYS ARE JUST MEAN AND HOMOPHOBIC_

_JB: you literally told me to get a man_

_park gae: i literally death glared everyone in class for you when you insisted on cuddling in front of them_

_wang gae: see platonic love between bros is cute and develops the friendship!!!! if you can’t hold my hand as a friend i can’t fuck with you_

_park gae: i literally held your hand all the way to the mcdonald’s the other day what are u talking about_

_JB: he’s high is what_

_park gae: probably it’s bc he hangs out too much with that jeonghan guy i can’t believe he never gets caught_

_wang gae: he doesn’t come to school high just goes home high_

_JB: that...doesn’t make sense...that’s worse_

_park gae: try having class with him he makes even less sense_

_JB: what are you two even doing i’m surprised you answered_

_wang gae: it’s an off day today, the teacher is sick and they couldn’t find anyone to sub last minute so we’re just lying around_

_park gae: i’m surprised they left us alone what with the people in here_

_JB: oh is that the ‘bad’ class?_

_wang gae: not bad, just loud_

>>

“Do it again!!” 

Sana sighs. She appreciated everyone thinking she’s cute, but this was getting old. “Really, again?”

“Yes!!!”

“Fine....Shy, shy, shy~!” She winks cutely.

Junhui squeals, jumping up and down like a kid. “Aaaah, so cute!!! That commercial is the best thing ever!”

“I regret it sometimes.”

“Aww why?”

“Because people like you make her do it all the time,” Minghao says.

“But it’s so cute!” Jun whines. 

“Why don’t you do it then?”

“I will! Shy, shy, shy~!” Jun says, his voice sickeningly sweet but adorable as he winks.

“Look hyung is blushing.”

“S-Shut up!” Minghao stutters, face tinged a slight pink. Godamn Junhui.

“Ha, hyung likes Jun-hyung.”

“Channie, stop teasing our precious HaoHao.”

“Soonyoung-hyung I told you I hate that name.”

“But whyyy??? It’s so cute and it fits, you’re our little HaoHao!”

Ooh!” Jun says. “Hao, hao, hao~!” He winks at Minghao who at this point just wants the floor to swallow him.

Jun was older but only when he wanted to be, the guy was an actual toddler half the time. Soonyoung has so much energy it made Minghao’s eyes hurt, he could always tell when the older boy was going to work them to death or drag them all across town on ‘adventures’. And freaking Chan, he was supposed to be the youngest but that kid had no filter and no fear.

Right now Sana was the only sane one. 

“Aaah, that’s so much cuter, I’m gonna start doing that version now. Hao, hao, hao~!” she grins at Minghao.

Never mind all his friends were the worst. 

“Hao, hao, hao~!” Jun says again.

“Hao, hao, hao~!” Soonyoung copied.

Pretty soon all four of them were surrounding him doing their obnoxious pose with their stupid cat paws and dumb wink and it was insufferably cute and Minghao hated himself for finding it so, and hated all of them for torturing him. 

He needs new friends. 

>>

“They’re kind of loud.”

“They’re kind of funny though.”

“Go talk to them then.”

“No, I’m okay.”

“Ah you’re so cute and shy Tzu-tzu.”

The Taiwanese girl sighs. “Soonyoung-Unnie, please stop calling me that.”

“What about Zoom Zoom instead?” the girl next to her teases. 

“That’s the worst thing I’ve ever heard,” Tzuyu says. 

“Either Zoom Zoom or tzu-tzu, take your pick!” Sooyoung grins.

“Tzu-tzu is fine...” 

“Aww Yeri came up with such a good nickname though!”

Tzuyu wasn’t quite sure how she ended up hanging around Sooyoung and Yerim. When she was transferred from Taiwan during the middle of the year, she wasn’t expecting to interact much with anyone. She’d always been shy and she had a habit of never lying so she wasn’t sure how well she’d do with people who’d already spent half their year together and made their own groups. 

But somehow, she managed to fit in with Yeri, who introduced her to Sooyoung, who happened to be loved by the whole school, which now meant by association Tzuyu had grown to be ‘popular.’ Being shy and popular was weird for her because suddenly people wanted to be her friend, wanted her number, guys and girls even started confessing to her and made her a bit uncomfortable, although she admits she is flattered. 

The feeling of being known just feels really weird for her still

>>

** a squad or something **

 

_angelordevil: on a scale of wow rude to omg that’s awful how bad would it be if i put a tack on the teacher’s chair_

_dokyeom: omg what_

_woowoo : on a scale of detention to ur expelled for assault why would you want to do that_

_jeongyaaass: do it u coward_

_bunnyeon: omg is he mean to u or something?_

_josh: we watched incredibles 1 last night and he wants to see if he can do it like dash does_

_boobitch: i’m typing this as he’s sharpening the tack rn call the police_

_woowoo: we know we’re all in the same class?_

_wendy: jeongyeon get your brother_

_jeongyaaass: we’re COUSINS and idc let him do it and get in trouble it’ll be funny_

_boobitch: wow he really is about to willingly get expelled_

_wonwoo: for the glory of science_

 

It really didn’t make sense why they were texting when they were all in the same room, but by now all of them had turned to Jeonghan, who was not so subtly playing with a sharp tack and smirking to himself. 

The whole thing was a perfectly weird picture of a sadist at work, but Jeonghan wasn’t a sadist and he also hated working. He really was just doing it for the hell of it. That and the teacher had accused him of coming to his class high which was just offensive. 

Moral of the story, don’t mess with Jeonghan but also know that the Incredibles is nothing like real life. He had barely started creeping towards the teachers desk when he was caught and the guy yelled at him and threatened detention.

Again.


	2. lunch time fun time

Lunch is always something of an impressive feat for The International School of Performing Arts. They had so many students that lunch had to be divided into three separate slots and students would arrange their own schedules around it as they pleased, but that didn’t mean lunch always went smoothly. 

The first lunch always went relatively well, the cafeteria was well-stocked and the servers and monitors fresh and ready for the day. 

The second lunch went a little less smooth, but okay enough because it was the least crowded lunch. The servers and monitors would have a break before the next one.

The third lunch was a battle. God knows why, but everyone always tried getting C Lunch whether to be with their friends or because of classes or whatever reasons, so the cafeteria was always packed and the monitors and servers would often get overwhelmed by the sheer mass of students. Considering it was a well-regarded speciality school one would think they were flawless in every execution, but the budget only goes so far (most of it for music equipment and paying the special instructors).

The staff can’t possibly prevent everything.

>>

** oldies but GOLDIES **

 

_irene: does anyone know who the guy with short grape color hair is? he’s tan and wears glasses sometimes_

_anactualbear: uhh no i don’t think so_

_leeminmin: me neither_

_sharkboi: no why?_

_wonho: maybe? idk_

_markiepooh: is something wrong noona?_

_irene: i’m not sure....i was in class today and i caught him and his friends staring at Seulgi and I_

_worldwidehandsome: more than usual noona?_

_irene: sort of...i mean i stared back and he looked away like he’d been caught and idk if it was because they just were trying to hit on us or something or if it’s something else...._

_suga: noona does he have dimples?_

_irene: yes actually, do you know who he is?_

_suga: we don’t really get along his names Kim Namjoon and he’s a bastard who thinks everything he spits has to have some deep ass meaning to it he’s annoying as hell_

_markiepooh: ohhh yeah didn’t you almost fight him in class that one year?_

_wonho: wow yoongi in a fight?_

_sharkboi: lil meow meow himself? woowww_

_suga: shut up kihyun you look like a hamster_

_leeminmin: B U R N B I T C H_

_sharkboi: first of all stfu minhyuk second of all fuc you LIL MEOW MEOW_

_markiepooh: chill you guys_

_worldwidehandsome: I know who he is too!! shame tho he’s kind of hot_

_irene: he is handsome, but it’s just that he keeps glancing over here and I’m with Seulgi again_

_wonho: where are u rn noona?_

_irene: lunch, i’m eating with Seulgi but she’s starting to feel uncomfortable since she hadn’t noticed before_

_anactualbear: sorry noona most of us are in class_

_suga: mark and i are here noona where r u sitting?_

_irene: middle table closest to the window why?_

_markiepooh: it’s gross that it has to be like this but we’ll come sit with you so they’ll stop staring_

_irene: i hate men_

_wonho: me too noona_

_leeminmin: yeah they’re the worst_

_sharkboi: shut up minhyuk you are a man_

_leeminmin: WHAT SO IS WONHO WTF_

_worldwidehandsome: on behalf of the male population we’re sorry noona_

_irene: not all men? you’re right the golden oldies would never do this_

_leeminmin: n o o n a D'X <3_

_wonho: that made my day omg_

_anactualbear: <3_

_sharkboi: we love you too noona <3_

_suga: that was so sappy thx <3_

_markiepooh: we’ll be there in a bit noona they wouldn’t try anything with you anyways they can’t even make eye contact with you properly you’re that powerful <3_

_irene: seulgi says she thinks they’re heading this way_

>>

Namjoon was indeed heading towards Joohyun, despite every muscle in his body telling him to just let it be. He'd stolen plenty of glances at her table since he'd sat down at his own, but he wasn't very discreet. Every time he looked she was staring right back, gaze cold.

“It’ll be fine, probably....just be polite and I’m sure she’ll understand we didn’t mean to come off rude," Hoseok says from beside him.

He exhales heavily, hoping they won't draw too much attention to themselves, but Joohyun is already staring at them the entire walk to her table. He'd rehearsed in his head about a million times how to apologize, but when he gets there all Namjoon can do is run his hands through his hair.

“Do you need something?” Joohyun asks, her irritation evident in the look she gives them both.

“U-Uhh yeah, Joohyun...noona?”

Joohyun raised a brow, eyes piercing and unamused. Across from her Seulgi let out a nervous giggle. 

“Uh sunbae?!” Namjoon panicks.

She says nothing and Namjoon swears her icy stare is stifling the air around them. Why did he even think this was a good idea? He's just about ready to die on the spot when Hoseok speaks up for them.

“Uh, excuse me?” Hoseok spoke up, voice seeming choked. “W-We just uh wanted to- Hey!”

Hoseok stumbles forward, lurching with Namjoon at his side and they both barely manage to grab the side of the table to keep from falling. 

“Hey what the hell-“ Namjoon starts.

“Move, you’re in the way.” 

Oh fuck no, he thinks. He knows that raspy grating voice anywhere.

“Don’t fucking push us then,” Namjoon spats.

“Don’t talk to Joohyun-noona then,” Yoongi retorts.

“S-Sorry,” Hoseok says. 

“No problem, bye bye now,” the other guy waves, grinning too brightly for Hoseoks liking. 

“We can talk to whoever we want _hyung_ ,” Namjoon says, voice laced with mockery. Yoongi was older than him, but they both knew the only time Namjoon would ever concede to such an expression is when they were both ready to fight. 

Namjoon didn’t even really know why this fued between them started. He didn’t have any problems with Yoongi at first, they were classmates and nothing more, but one day was all it took for them to be at each other’s throats on a daily basis. Lately, they hadn’t seen much of each other which was better for everyone involved but the school was only so big, they were bound to meet again.

“Oh, really?” Yoongi sneers stepping forward, almost face to face with him. “Did you guys hear that?

“Hmm, yeah, but does your friend feel the same way?” Mark grins, teeth bared. This guy and his smiles were a lot more unnerving than Min Yoongi and his scowls. With Yoongi, what he feels is evident throughout his whole body, but not this guy. The smile doesn't reach anywhere, Namjoon can see that in the subtle tensing of the guys hands.

“What? No? I mean I don't know -- look we just came to apologize to them," Hoseok stutters, gesturing to Joohyun and Seulgi (the latter who has inched away from them).

“Well you wouldn’t have had to apologize if you weren’t staring in the first place,” Mark says.

“I didn’t know it was illegal to fucking have eyes,” Namjoon growls, bumping closer to a scoffing Yoongi. “Seulgi-ssi made a noise so we looked, it’s not our fault she was loud.”

Irene isn't one for spectacles, isn't one for the drama. She deals with problems quickly and cleanly, which is what she reminds herself of before she commits an uncharacteristic act of violence against Namjoon (Seulgi later assures her that she knows she could take him -- not true, but assuring nonetheless).

“You came over here to apologize?“ she spats. “Well do it. Apologize to Seulgi. Now.” 

Her voice was firm and emotionless, but Namjoon can feel the anger in her eyes shooting out at him like freaking lasers or something and it pisses him off because the logical part of him (the part he usually trusts) knows it's best to just apologize and move on. But fucking Min Yoongi looks so smug -- and at this point he knows they have an audience -- and there is no way he's letting this insufferable asshole hold anything over him.

Logic goes out the window completely. 

>>

“This is honestly the worst plan in the whole universe like why? _Why?_ "

“It's not the best, but stop being such a drama queen Mingyu,” Jooheon says, but his eyes haven't left their two friends who've just gotten up to apologize to the most well-known person in the entire school. 

“I agree Mingyu is a drama queen, but I’m with him about the plan, it’s not smart.”

“Why don’t you come up with something then?” Seungcheol huffs.

“I wasn’t the one who freaking turned all the way around and full-on STARED for a solid minute like you guys! She probably thinks we’re creeps!” Changkyun yells.

“Oh my god, keep your voice down!" Mingyu practically shrieks. "She's like the queen of modelling! If word gets around that I so much as looked at her wrong my career will DIE and my agent has been scheduling gigs for months, so stop. SCREAMING."

“You realize YOU'RE the one screaming now right?"

"Your job will be fine," Seungcheol assures, before Mingyu screeches again.

"Or maybe not," Jooheon sighs, pointing.

Two guys have shown up at Joohyun’s table and he has no idea who they are or what they're doing but one of them pushed Namjoon and Hoseok and that's all he needs to know that this is not going according to plan.

"Oh my god, we have to go over there don't we?" Mingyu moans when he sees Namjoon almost face-to-face with the shorter guy. The height difference would be funny if he wasn't about to faint. 

“Fuck, this is what I meant!” Changkyun groans. “We should have done this privately and not all out in the open in front of the whole school, now everyone knows we had a problem with them!”

“God we have to go over there now don’t we?” Mingyu asks, already standing. 

>>

“Not to be dramatic but these are literally the best spicy french fries I’ve ever had, I’m surprised they actually served this," Jisoo says, stuffing herself with the rare treat.

Most schools serve a typical school lunch of off-brand veggies, protein, and fruit. The International School of Performing Arts prides itself on extending their curriculum and values into lunch as well. Students are given a variety of organic, fresh products guaranteed to provide bundles of energy and promote a healthy lifestyle in everyone. 

“These days, most of the budget is going to expanding the campus and stuff, so lucky us." Taehyung isn't being sarcastic, he loves potatoes.

“I literally can’t look at you two, ugh.”

“It’s not that bad Jiminnie-hyung,” Youngjae muses. “At least the salad is still okay.” 

“Salad is for rabbits and vegans,” Taehyung says, eating another french fry. 

“Salad is for people who don’t want to pollute their stomach with grease and processed flavoring Taehyung.”

“You’re so uptight Jiminie, is there anyone we can hook him up with Jisoo?” 

“Maybe? You’re straight right?”

“No, but that doesn't matter I don't trust whatever people you may think of.”

“Hey, I know some good people!”

“It’s true hyung,” Youngjae says. “She knows Park Jinyoung remember?”

“Speaking of, there he is!” Jisoo jumps up, waving. “Oppa!”

“Ooh introduce him to Youngjae so he can meet up with Jaebum!!” Taehyung grins.

“W-What, no! Sit down Jisoo, stop it! Fuck I hate you guys!”

“Your company is as rowdy as you are, I see.”

“Yeah, these are my math class friends!” Jisoo smiles. “Kim Taehyung, Park Jimin, and our sunshine Choi Youngjae!” 

Youngjae blushes.

“Ah, he really is a sunshine! So cute!” the guy next to Jinyoung squealed, looking like he wanted to tackle Youngjae. 

“Sunshine, indeed.” Jinyoung smiled at him, and Youngjae gave a shy smile. God, his skin was flawless up close. 

Anyone who was anyone knew about Park Jinyoung. Long-time singer, flawless dancer and choreographer, part-time model, aspiring actor, and half of the legendary JJ Project. Him and Im Jaebum were well-known throughout the school as the biggest power couple there was (couple being used very loosely).

“Th-Thank you,” Youngjae stuttered, hoping he didn’t sound as awkward as he felt. “I know about you, but who is your friend?” 

“Oh, that’s just Jackson don’t mind him, he has no concept whatsoever about personal space.” 

“Affection is normal you guys are just mean,” he says, attaching himself to Jinyoungs back with a pout. “You and JB-hyung never want to return my love!”

“Uh, JB?” Youngjae asks.

“Jaebum, Im Jaebum, you know that fool with the stupid twin moles, I guess you could say he’s the other half of JJP." Jinyoung rolls his eyes like Jaebum's very existence vexes him.

“Haha I’m telling Jaebum-hyung you said that to the sunshine,” Jackson giggles. 

The sunshine...? Youngjae blinks, confused but before he can say anything there's yelling across the room and it's the last thing he hears before coming face-to-face with a plate full of salad dressing.

>>

“This is quite literally the worst day of my life,” Tzuyu says, deadpan. 

She was huddled underneath the table with Yeri, who hadn’t managed to escape much of the carnage. There was ketchup in her dripping from her short brown hair.

“Yeah, I feel bad for unnie, that outfit was new,” Yeri laughs.

“Everything I’m wearing is suede you animals!” Sooyoung cries, throwing a cup of jello across the room.

Normally, Sooyoung is a cheery, easy-going person but that all disappears the moment someone dares ruin her outfit.

“Rest in peace her sanity and custom suede pantsuit.”

What was the point of being popular if in the end it was everyone for themselves during a food fight? 

>>

Minghao considers himself a smart person. He knows how school dynamics work, he's watched High School Musical enough (thanks Junhui) to know that anyone can get swept up in the drama or become a target any second. As such, he sticks to himself and his few friends, never provoking or letting himself be provoked, and so far it’s been going good. So far, he hasn’t had to do anything drastic or unexpected like dive under a random table to save himself from flying ice cream. 

Until today. 

“I didn’t even get to eat lunch yet what the hell?!” Junhui whines, picking at his ruined clothes. “Why did I wear white today?!”

“All you wore was a white jacket, I wore white EVERYTHING,” Sana pouts.

“Aww that sucks, your outfit is so cute too!” 

Minghao jumps, his head hitting the table. "Ow! Fuck -- who are all of you?"

“It’s just two of us!” says a different girl, with short brown hair. 

“Hey, you’re the girl from the commercial!” the first girl says, long black hair slathered in mustard. “Shy, shy, shy~!” She does the pose, winking cutely and beaming.

It's arguably not a good time to be gushing -- about anything -- but Sana giggles at the girls impersonation. Maybe the commercial wasn't so bad after all.

"I’m Dahyun! This is my friend, Chaeyoung!” The other girl waves, smiling. “You’re welcome to share our sanctuary as long as you do one thing!” 

“What?” Minghao asks, ready to do anything to avoid going back out there. 

“Am I as cute as you?” she asks Sana, giving her what Minghao thought was a bad attempt at a smirk and raises her eye brows. She was bold though, Minghao will give her that, usually it's Sana flirting with people.

“Y-Yes,” Sana stutters, blushing. 

“Wrong!” 

Oh, fuck.

“You’re the cutest,” Dahyun says, giving Sana’s nose a quick boop. “But since you’re so nice I’ll let you stay, but you only.”

“WHAT?!” Junhui screeches as Dahyun and Chaeyoung burst into laughter. 

“She’s kidding, she’s kidding!” Chaeyoung assures. “You guys can stay here as long as you like, get comfy because there were only like two monitors today so it’ll take them a while to end this.”

This is exactly why Minghao avoids people.

>>

“I can safely say being in a food fight is no nearly as fun as it looks in movies.” Jisoo flaps her arm, trying to clean it of...beans?

“You fucking think?” Youngjae spats, wiping at his face only to smear the salad dressing and mix it with whatever other food was on his sleeve. That sunshine disposition was long gone the moment someone threw gravy into his hair. 

“Ah!” Jackson shrieks as a giant glob of god knows what lands a few feet from there hiding spot underneath the table. “Who the FUCK started this?”

“From what I heard it had someone to do with Bae Joohyun and her friends,” Taehyung says picking at his chocolate milk soaked pants. 

“From what you heard? The fight just started like two seconds ago.” Jimin scoffs, running his fingers through broccoli ridden hair. This was going to be a nightmare to moisturize. 

“I doubt that,” Jinyoung adds, legs folded up awkwardly to make sure they all fit under the crowded table. “Irene isn’t the type of person to do something this childish, if she has a problem with you, she’ll deal with you personally. That or her cavalry, but she barely ever gets them involved.”

“Cavalry?”

“The group of ‘92 and ‘93 liners that always hang out together. I’m sure you all know them and that you don’t mess with them if you don’t have a death wish.”

“Actually-“

“Eww what the fuck is this?!” Youngjae screeches flicking some weird brown mass off his pants. 

 

** triple JX3 **

 

_park gae: hey dumbass_

_JB: i’m gonna assume you’re talking to Jackson_

_wang gae: first of all RUDE second of all hELP_

_JB: no thanks_

_park gae: Jaebum pls come help us there’s a fucking food fight going on rn in the cafeteria_

_JB: wtf no there’s not_

_park gae: there literally is you asshole why would i lie_

_wang gae: we’re hiding out under a table with our precious underclassmen we’re stuck!!!_

_JB: what are you even saying_

_park gae: jaebum im fucking serious we were talking to youngjae then someone threw salad at him and now it’s world war 3 in here_

_wang gae: the sunshine has been hit!!_

_JB: shut up i’m coming don’t let anyone hit Youngjae_

 

“Jaebum is coming, hopefully the dumbass will know to inform a teacher.”

“Oh thank god for Jaebum-hyung,” Youngjae sighs, then blushes when he notices everyone staring at him.

Jinyoung says nothing, but smirks to himself and makes note of it.

“Anyways, now that you mention it there were these guys at Bae Joohyun’s table right before this all started, everyone in the cafeteria was staring at them.”

“Who?” 

Taehyung shrugged. “I don’t know, there was a big group of them.” 

>>

Objectively, Namjoon knew this was his fault. He shouldn’t have stared, shouldn’t have made such a big scene about apologizing, should have walked away when Yoongi started running his smart mouth.

But objectively, Namjoon didn’t really fucking care because he now able to say he punched Min Yoongi.

In the nose. With a tray full of cold runny soup. 

Not his fist, he wasn’t an idiot. He knew he’d be expelled if he ever started a fight. Nobody said anything about a food fight though. 

“FOOD FIGHT!” someone had yelled, and that’s all it took. 

It was like one of those classic high school movies. All it took was one or two people getting decked with food and the rest of the cafeteria was sure to follow suit, everyone always wanted to be in a food fight. Pretty soon, there was food flying in every direction and the last thing he saw before he ran was Min Yoongi and Mark Tuan getting nailed with the biggest piece of Salisbury steak he’d ever seen in his life. 

Thank God for lousy cafeteria food.

>>

Thanks to Jaebum (and a couple of teachers who quickly realized what the ruckus down the hall was), the food fight was broken up, but it was a little late. 

Everyone in the cafeteria, monitors and lunch servers included was covered in food. In cases like these, students are usually horrible sources of information, they always go with the best rumor when questioned, but this time everyone was consistent.

Everyone was absolutely sure that it started from Bae Joohyun’s table along with her friends and some underclassmen. It didn’t take very long for the principal to decide that the shenanigans were perpetrated by them.

The only part students somehow collectively omitted was the fact that instead of a food fight it was about two seconds away from being a real fight, and that all those people really shouldn’t be put in the same room.

 

>>

** oldies but GOLDIES **

 

_irene: we are officially at war_

_suga: oh hell yes_

_markiepooh: i second that_

_worldwidehandsome: yeah, we heard what happened at lunch_

_sharkboi: weren’t you two there to make sure nothing like that happened?_

_leeminmin: from what i hear, we’re lucky lil meow meow didn’t throw hands immediately_

_anactualbear: fix your vocabulary, but yeah i heard the same_

_markiepooh: i’m surprised noona didn’t throw hands you should’ve seen her face when that idiot blamed Seulgi_

_suga: that was the single greatest moment of my life noona was practically shooting lasers out her eyes at the bastard_

_markiepooh: more like ice beams, did you not see how still his friend was? i kinda wish he’d have reacted badly so I’d have an excuse but maybe next time_

_wonho: you two realize that if this happens again NO ONE is allowed to physically fight each other unless you want to be suspended right?_

_markiepooh: hey as long as no one lays hands on me then we have no problems_

_suga: no promises when it comes that fucking soggy bowl of cereal namjoon_

_leeminmin: .....soggy bowl of cereal...? oh yoongi_

_sharkboi: what happened to savage august d of the streets of daegu_

_anactualbear: have you ever had a soggy bowl of cereal? that’s gross_

_worldwidehandsome: as someone who is actually in food i can tell you a soggy bowl of cereal is one of the worst foods to be_

_irene: yeah i’d say that’s a pretty valid insult no one wants a soggy bowl of cereal. anyways i am serious this is war Namjoon and his friends are toast and so is anyone who defends him seulgi still can’t wash the muck out of her hair and she feels guilty_

_wonho: send her our condolences(?) idk just sorry i guess_

_suga: same i just dyed it back to its natural color too and thank you to the people with brains who appreciate a good insult_

_markiepooh: i wanna know why they put all of us in the same room_

_wonho: stop don’t do anything_

_irene: we aren’t but Kim Namjoon and Yoongi have been glaring at each other for the past 20 minutes_

_suga: well he’s a bastard so_

 

>>

** min yoongi is a bastard **

 

_coups: omg the name_

_rapmon: am i wrong?_

_hobi: after what happened no not really_

_joohoney: i can’t believe they put all of you in the same room_

_gyu: i’m just glad we didn’t get dragged in there_

_I.M.: yeah i can’t imagine what it feels like in that room rn_

_hobi: feels....murdery_


	3. spilling the tea honey

** everything before 1998 was a mistake **

_hyunjinyoung: food fights are gross but i kindaaaaa wish we were there_

_fixitfelix: speak for yourself i’m fine being clean thank you very much_

_hanhan: nah i’m with hyunjinnie it seems pretty fun_

_ilikedark: yeah no food fights are so childish_

_seungseung: oooh but i heard it was one of the upperclassmen who started it_

_I.N: really? who?_

_yaknow: rumor is that queen of the school herself Bae Joohyun started it_

_fixitfelix : i call bs_

_I.N: bonafide bullshit_

_hanhan: LANGUAGE CHILD_

_hyunjinyoung: i definitely think that’s a rumor no way she’d do that_

_yaknow: i’m just relaying what i know kiddos_

_ilikedark: you mean what you’ve been eavesdropping on_

_yaknow: fuck u my methods are legit_

>>

** *angelordevil changed the group name to: "spill the tea or i spill your guts" **

_angelordevil: hey seungkwan i heard a fun little rumor today_

_boobitch: only one? i started at least 12_

_dokyeom: you guys are such gossips omg_

_jeongyaaass: spill it heifer_

_angelordevil: well rumor has it that Bae Joohyun is the one who started the food fight but bc she’s dating....guess who_

_woowoo: who???_

_angelordevil: what part of guess can’t you read_

_josh: you? we really don’t know_

_wendy: just tell us_

_angelordevil: what’s the point of a chat for tea if your so called friends don’t even thirst for it_

_jeongyaaass: I NEEED IT_

_woowoo: is that enough thirst?_

_angelordevil: i hate all of you, but fine it’s yoongi, min yoongi that kitten looking dude_

_jeongyaaass: what that doesn’t make any sense i thought Joohyun only dated girls_

_bunnyeon: yeah i thought so too_

_josh: well she never has said anything so we shouldn’t really assume_

_angelordevil : hence the tea my friends, hence the tea_

_boobitch: i thought you were going to say it’s because she’s dating Seulgi bc that’s what i’ve heard_

_wonwoo: the plot thickens_

_jeongyaaass: thiccens_

_wendy: that’s what i heard too actually_

_josh: yeah i actually thought they already were dating_

_angelordevil: hey i’m just saying what i heard maybe she’s bi who knows_

_dokyeom: actually....._

_jeongyaaass: what_

_boobitch: omg hyung knows something_

_josh: oh wow do you?_

_bunnyeon: i didn’t take you for a gossip seokmin_

_angelordevil: spILL IT RIGHT NOW_

_woowoo: yeah this is getting interesting_

_wendy: indeed_

_dokyeom: well you know how i hang out with the ‘97 liners?_

>>

** ‘97 ftw **

_doubleb: biiiitttttcccchhhh_

_gyeommie: wuuuutttttt_

_chris: he’s talking about luuuuuuuunch_

_the8: omg shut uuuuuuuuup_

_ballermina: i’m so glad i wasnt there_

_dokyeom: it looked sort of fun_

_actualgoddess: uh yeah no_

_rosie: can u believe all the food they wasted???!?! animals_

_kookie: i’m pretty sure they meant bc they didn’t wanna get pelted with food but ok_

_lalalalisa: who all was actually there?_

_gyu: me_

_the8: me_

_chris: lmao rip_

_gyeommie: what happened tho like why’d it start_

_doubleb: duuuuuude everyone is saying Bae Joohyun started it_

_actualgoddess: fake news_

_rosie: LE GASP_

_dokyeom: UNLIKELY BUT OK_

_ballermina: yeah i don’t believe that_

_lalalalisa: i can’t imagine her starting a food fight_

_kookie: gyu and hao you guys were actually there what happened?_

_the8: idk everyone just started throwing food out of nowhere and next thing i knew i’m hiding under a fucking table with Sana Jun and some hyperactive gay_

_gyeommie: hyperactive gay jsjfbdksm that’s bambam lmao_

_doubleb: says the one keyboard smashing_

_chris: quick everyone smash or you’re straight JSGENSJSK_

_lalalalisa: TSHGIBDG_

_dokyeom: i’m not even that gay but EEJKSALN_

_gyeommie: solidarity GEBEKSBDMS_

_actualgoddess: AZBDNDK_

_kookie: YEHSBSKFOF join us bambam_

_rosie: me? straight? hilarious AHEBFNDOWVRNF_

_ballermina: habfleben this is fun_

_the8: i hate all of you ashfbdlgk_

_doubleb: fine JSKYEINEA_

_chris: mingyu where r u_

_mingyu: .....guys....i have something to tell you...._

_doubleb: wat_

_gyu: it’s kinda bad....._

_chris: omg whats wrong_

_dokyeom: .-._

_actualgoddess: it’s ok we’re here_

_rosie: oh my god youre frying aren’t you_

_lalalalisa: worse he’s straight_

_ballermina: im gonna assume you meant dying but what is it mingyu_

_gyu: you can’t get mad_

_gyeommie: what is it mingyu_

_the8: stop being dramatic just tell us_

_kookie: yeah it’s fine just say it_

_gyu: you know how i hang out with the guys in my rap class a lot?_

_kookie: yeah_

_rosie: omg they’re blackmailing u aren’t they_

_lalalalisa: or worse they’re ALL STRAIGHT_

_gyeommie: omg lisa ur the worst_

_doubleb: #thaigang_

_rosie: copycat_

_chris: #aussiegang4ever_

_ballermina: i’m gonna make a #jpngang_

_the8: in that case should i make a #chinagang ??_

_actualgoddess: ignore all of them mingyu just spill it_

_gyu: we’re the reason for the food fight_

_doubleb: biiittcccchhh_

_gyeommie: booooiiiiii_

_chris: lmaaaaoooo_

_ballermina: elaborate_

_actualgoddess: why would u start a food fight_

_dokyeom: i’m proud of u_

_lalalalisa: same you’ve done the ‘97 line proud_

_kookie: that’s not bad tho??_

_rosie: yeah you had me thinking u we’re dying or something_

_the8: yeah i hate u more now but so?_

_gyu: it wasn’t our fault entirely tho it really was Bae Joohyun and her friends!!!_

_doubleb: wtf bro_

_gyeommie: ?????_

_dokyeom: sounds fake but ok_

_chris: whyyyy uuu always lyyyyiing ohhhh my god_

_lalalalisa: blocked_

_rosie: unfriended_

_ballermina: your mom can’t come to my moms bday party_

_actualgoddess: is that how that saying goes? but ok mingyu if u say so_

_kookie: yeah noah fence but wat_

_the8: why would she start a food fight_

_gyu: because Namjoon almost fought her and her friend Min Yoongi!!!_

_gyeommie: bitch wat_

_doubleb: *breathes in*_

_lalalalisa: *breaths out*_

_chris: BOI_

_actualgoddess: y’all are funny_

_ballermina: first of all who taught you to say y’all second r u sure about that mingyu_

_gyu: i’m not kidding i promise it’s just that her friend Seulgi was laughing real loud during class so me and the guys just turned and Bae Joohyun caught us staring so she stared back and it was too late and i swear i almost burst into flames on the spot and i told them we should have just let it go and pretend nothing happened but fucking Namjoon-hyung was like nooo they’re gonna think we hate them or something or that we’re sexist and Changkyun told them we should’ve just apologized privately or talked to one of her friends about it but nooo Jooheon-hyung said the plan was ok but Hoseok-hyung and Namjoon-hyung where the only ones who were actually gonna do it bc i don’t have a death wish and neither does Cheol-hyung but it literally just went to shit bc Min Yoongi and his friend got there and Namjoon-hyung HATES him and next thing ik we’re all getting up to go help bc they’re about to FIGHT like actually FIGHT you guys like wtf and idk why hyung did that but he hit Min Yoongi with his own tray and then suddenly boom food fight and now i’m pretty sure my days are numbered bc Bae Joohyun is going to ruin my career as a model and a human being_

_actualgoddess: .....wow okay...._

_doubleb: this tea is SCALDING_

_ballermina: scalding indeed_

_the8: mingyu you’re such an idiot i swear_

_dokyeom: r.i.p._

_kookie: here lies mingyu and company_

_chris: lmao mingyu and his friends are deceased_

_rosie: i’m sorry but this is so funny_

_lalalalisa: Bae Joohyun is gonna eat u and ur pals alive my dude_

_gyeommie: lol what r u gonna do now?_

_gyu: i don’t know ; w ; there’s no way Min Yoongi and Namjoon hyung are gonna leave each other alone now but i just want to live the rest of my school life in PEACE WHY ME_

_the8: suffer_


	4. i would sell you for a cornchip

The next day was...somewhat tense.

Rumors were flying about the food fight and almost no one was actually paying attention in class. It was irritating, especially for someone like Lee Jihoon who quite frankly didn’t give a flying fuck whether the queen of the school started the fight or not. 

“Hansol, get off your phone I thought you wanted to write your own parts.”

“I do hyung, but you should see the memes everyone’s posting about the food fight I don’t even know how they managed to take pictures during it,” Hansol laughs. 

“I would literally fight a man if I ended up as gross as everyone in that food fight,” Hyungwon adds, making a face. 

“With those long ass legs,” Jaebum teases.

“You’re literally only one inch shorter than me.”

Jaebum shrugs, grinning. It’s so easy to rile up Chae Hyungwon. The guy is incredibly talented in everything he does, model, DJ, dancer, choreographer, singing, but he has the funniest ugliest most bizarre reactions and faces Jaebum’s ever seen.

“Do you have a leg kink or something?” Jihoon asks, half-serious. 

Jaebum blushes and Hyungwon chokes on air. 

“Shut up Jihoon.” 

“Yeah, hyung stop,” Hansol says, grinning. “He’s only interested in ‘the literal reincarnation of the sun’ Choi Youngjae, remember?” 

Hyungwon chokes again, making a disgusted face Hansol can’t resist taking a picture of for future reference. “You’re so sappy.”

“As hilarious as it is to see you almost crash into lockers everytime you see him in the hallway, you should just ask him out already before someone else does,” Jihoon says, done with the conversation. If you like someone, just simply ask them out. It’s not that hard.

Hyungwon nods. “Yeah then maybe you’ll stop lusting after my legs weirdo.”

Jaebum blushes again and Hansol laughs, taking another picture of Hyungwon’s judging face. 

>>

** triple JX3 **

 

_JB: do you guys think i should actually ask Youngjae out....?_

_wang gae: OH MY GOD YES HE IS EVEN CUTER IN PERSON_

_park gae: yes moron_

_wang gae: he is an ACTUAL sunshine i swear he looks like a baby otter_

_park gae: i’m almost certain he likes you and if not then i guess you’ll just live the rest of your life in shame but i mean hey do it if it fails i get to see something disastrous if you succeed then you’ll shut up about it_

_JB: first off you’re the worst friend ever how are we still JJP second what do you mean how do u know that??_

_wang gae: you guys are JJP because you’re SOULMATES you belong together!!!_

_JB: that’s lame as hell jackson and that’s not what i meant_

_park gae: i would literally sell jaebum for a corn chip_

_JB: fuck you but why do you think Youngjae likes me??_

_park gae: he doesn’t???_

_JB: you literally just said you think he likes me stop playing_

_park gae: no idea what your talking about_

_JB: park jinyoung i’m serious_

_wang gae: ooooooh he used the FULL NAME it’s serious now_

_park gae: whos park jinyoung??? i’m jr._

_JB: you literally said you’d throat punch me if i ever brought that name back you hypocrite_

>>

“I bet you hyung is making that ugly mad face he does with his chin right now,” Jackson cackles.

“It’s so easy to mess with him about this,” Jinyoung smirks.

“You’re so evil, I love you.”

“Yes I am, now stop touching me.”

“But you’re so manly!” Jackson squeals, clinging to Jinyoung. “You’ve been working out a lot more lately, are you trying to impress me?” 

Jinyoung ignores him. He’s too focused on orchestrating the most overly complicated hook up of his life. 

 

** 4DJisoo **

_park gae: hey Jisoo_

_4Djisoo: oppa!!! you never text me whats up???_

_park gae: I have a question_

_4Djisoo: ????_

_park gae: how is your sunshine friend?_

_4Djisoo: he’s fine! why do you ask??_

_park gae: because he’s cute_

_4Djisoo: OOOOOOH OPPA DO YOU LIKE HIM_

_park gae: someone does_

_4Djisoo: who?!?! i promise i won’t tell!!!_

_park gae: i find that hard to believe, but you should give me his number_

_4Djisoo: nooooo not until ik why i gotta protect our precious fluff_

_park gae: precious fluff omg fine it’s not me_

_4Djisoo: is it your friend?? the one who doesn’t like personal space???_

_park gae: no it’s not it’s that dumbass Jaebum_

_4Djisoo: omfg i knew it this is the greatest day of my life_

_park gae: your life? why?_

_4Djisoo: youngjae is WHIPPED for Im Jaebum he NEVER stops talking about him we’ve told him a million times to just ask him out but he thinks Jaebum is too cool and says he’ll never notice him_

_park gae: he should hear the moron talk it’s always sunshine this and sunshine that and omg he’s so cute i wanna punch him on the lips with my lips it’s so gross_

_4Djisoo: try hearing Youngjae go on and on about omg Jaebum-hyung is the hottest man on the planet!! and omg step on me!!! ik we call him a sunshine but he’s so nasty sometimes_

_park gae: ...i did not need to know that...._

_4Djisoo: ooh yeah sorry don’t tell anyone about that hehehe i’ll give you Youngjae’s number tho we’re gonna be the best matchmakers_

_park gae: we?_

_4Djisoo: yeah we you can’t do this without me i’m youngjae’s friend!!_

_park gae: fine, just give me his number already_

 

“Well this is gonna be interesting,” Jinyoung says, showing his phone to a squealing Jackson.


	5. god is a fish

Joohyun is not the type of person to actively start mess. She usually keeps to herself and tries to actually avoid the spotlight (despite her burgeoning fan club) because as someone in the entertainment industry, she knows how easy it is for outsiders to take things out of context and then over-analyze. 

The last time someone had allegedly looked at her wrong, all those 'admirers' had made it their business to seek the person out and deal with it themselves. She had to promise and reassure them it was no big deal until they backed off. 

Not this time though.

If she was honest, the fact that Namjoon hit Yoongi didn’t even matter, Yoongi would deal with that himself.

The problem was that him and his stupid group had made Seulgi upset. 

Seulgi has an intimidating reputation, sharp eyes seeming to cut into people’s conscience, but the girl is an actual teddy bear (and Joohyun may or may not have a major soft spot for her).

So, if anyone asks her about the food fight, she has no qualms about blaming Namjoon and his idiotic bunch of friends for it all. What happens afterwards will happen, her only concern is that Seulgi feels comfortable and safe. 

“N-Noona, people a-are saying you st-started the fight, but there’s no way, r-right?” some poor underclassmen asked her.

“No, not at all,” she’d reply with a reassuring smile. “It was a big group of boys from my class, Kim Namjoon and his friends.” 

“Joohyun-ssi, is it true that you and Yoongi-ah started the fight during lunch?” A classmate asks her later.

“Yoongi hates being disturbed, of course not,” she’d say, incredulous. “It was a bunch of rowdy underclassmen from the rap class they stuck me in, Jung Hoseok or something and his friends.”

“Yah, we better watch out and not mess with noona,” Seokjin says during class after observing her.

“I never took you for a trash talker noona,” Hyunwoo says. 

Hoseok laughs. "Minhyuk is our trash talker. When noona does it, it feels a lot more devious and planned.” 

Joohyun shrugs. “I’m not trash talking anyone, I’m simply explaining what happened, and if someone wants to take it a certain way and do something because of it then that’s their business.”

Hoseok laughs again, eyes scrunching up cutely. “Ah, I love you noona.”

“I’m just glad we have at least one class without a bunch of underclassmen,” Hyunwoo sighs, relaxed. There was nothing wrong with the underclassmen, but he had plenty of classes with those kids so this was his sanctuary away from all the shenanigans.

Seokjin nods in agreement. "Yeah, some of them are just so....much. I mean were we that bad?"

"Our upperclassmen told me they used to think I was condescending."

"We all kind of thought that noona," Hoseok admits.

"They thought I was too shy," Hyunwoo says.

"A lot of them thought I was cocky, but I mean look at me." Seokjin gestures to his face. "Upperclassmen or under, I'm beautiful to everyone.

"Speaking of that, are underclassmen invited to your party?"

Jin shrugs. “ I invited a few I don't completely hate, but you know I don't really care as long as no one trashes my house." 

Kim Seokjin has just three rules when he's hosting parties. One; don't trash the house and he won't 'accidentally' trash your car (don't ask how). Two; bring your own drinks, drugs, music, whatever you need because he's not providing. Three; under NO circumstances is anyone allowed into his room or his parents room. If your trying to do the nasty that's what the guest bedrooms are for.

“Let’s just hope that no unsavory characters show up,” Joohyun says with a look.

“I doubt it, its kinda last minute.”

“Who did you actually invite?”

“Everyone in our year, all the ‘93 liners, the cashier from Starbucks, and a handful of underclassmen. You know I don't care too much about plus ones though, just as long as everyone is clear on the rules."

“Is that Jeonghan guy coming?” Hoseok asks.

Jin nods, grinning. “Oh, definitely, he's the only dealer I trust."

>>

** spill the tea or i spill your guts **

_angelordevil: clear your schedules hoes_

_woowoo: we are not going with you to see your supplier again_

_wendy: yeah no that was so awkward_

_bunnyeon: i liked him, he was nice_

_dokyeom: yeah sorry but no way we are doing that again_

_josh: eh i didn’t mind too much_

_angelordevil: rude but that’s not why it’s about a party_

_jeongyaaass: you have my attention_

_boobitch: mine too_

_angelordevil: i don’t know whether to be offended that i didn’t already have your attention or proud that you understand priorities_

_wendy: we have very different views on what constitutes a priority_

_dokyeom: what party?_

_angelordevil: last minute thing all I know is that it's an upperclassmen thing but I'm their dealer so we all get to go because I say so i'll send details later_

_jeongyaaass: niiiccceee_

_josh: hey as long as they pay you man_

_boobitch: yeah as long as we can go too idc_

_josh: get them the really good stuff we just tried the other day_

_bunnyeon: waaat you smoke too shua???_

_josh: of course, i’m from LA_

_woowoo: i could use a night of bad choices too tbh_

_boobitch: hehehe is it because you chickened out again?_

_wendy: ????_

_woowoo: shut up_

_josh: ohhh is it what i think it is_

_bunnyeon: aww i think it is haha_

_angelordevil: hehehe wonwoo is smitten is what_

_jeongyaaass: omg it’s about that giant in his home ec class isn’t it_

_dokyeom: hyung i’ve already told you i could get you his number i am friends with him you know_

_wonwoo: yeah no_

_wendy: maybe you’ll see him at the party??_

>>

** ‘97 ftw **

_dokyeom: hey hey hey guess what_

_doubleb: ????_

_gyeommie: what’s up_

_dokyeom: well you know how things are a little meh since the food fight?_

_ballermina: it’s only been a day but yes your right_

_actualgoddess: not to interrupt but do you guys ever notice that Mina’s name also looks like it’s saying baller mina? like she’s ballin?_

_rosie: haha it does_

_lalalalisa: that’s cute lol_

_ballermina: ...i guess??_

_the8: you were saying seokmin??_

_dokyeom: oh yeah, who wants to get drunk and/or high tonight?_

_kookie: maybe_

_chris: i probably wont but sure why not_

_gyu: don’t cross fade but me count me in_

_ballermina: elaborate pls_

_dokyeom: jeonghan-hyung was invited to a party and he invited all of us so now i’m inviting you guys, i’ll send the address later_

_doubleb: fuck yeaaaa_

_chris: let’s get it boiiiissss_

_gyeommie: i’m not drinking but i’ll go_

_kookie: yeah that stuff tastes bad but i’ll go_

_lalalalisa: i don’t really want to drink either but i’ll go!!_

_actualgoddess: i’ll pick you up Mina_

_ballermina: k and im a ballerina not a baller altho i could be_

_rosie: yeah i’ll go too :)_

_the8: i’ll be there, Jun wants to go and so will Soonyoung-hyung_

_dokyeom: yeah feel free to invite more people, jeonghan says the more people the more money he can make_

_gyu: i can’t wait to regret everything_

>>

** min yoongi is a bastard **

_gyu: who wants to get shit faced_

_joohoney: uh what_

_I.M.: why_

_rapmon: i’m always down but yeah why_

_gyu: you don’t need a reason but there’s a party tonight_

_hobi: you guys know i can’t drink but sure_

_coups: i’ll be there i could use a drink or fifty_

_gyu: yeah exactly why i’m gonna get shit faced_

_I.M.: eh idk_

_rapmon: c’mon changkyun, jooheon is going_

_joohoney: i never said that_

_coups: that means yes_

_I.M.: fine, where at not that i’m driving ANYONE home_

_gyu: not sure yet i’ll let you guys know_

>>

** everything before 1998 was a mistake **

_fixitfelix: who wants to go to our first SENIOR PARTY_

_ilikedark: ehh_

_yaknow: bitch you know i’m in_

_seungseung: hmm interesting_

_I.N.: my parents would kill me_

_hyunjinyoung: same, so yes count me in_

_hanhan: oooh whos party?_

_fixitfelix: i kinda maybe sort of want to say it could might possibly be Kim Seokjin_

_seungseung: woah how’d you get invited to his house_

_ilikedark: yeah i’m impressed_

_hanhan: that guy is HANDSOME AS FUCK_

_fixitfelix: i wasn’t directly invited per se, Chan invited me to it and he said i could bring whoever I wanted and the only party talk I've heard is about Kim Seokjin so fingers crossed that it's his :3_

_I.N: are u sure we can come?_

_hyunjinyoung: yeah won’t it be weird since we’re all underclassmen?_

_yaknow: i don't give a fuck i’m going_

_ilikedark: yeah me neither let’s go_

_seungseung: yeah let’s have fun_

_fixitfelix : I’m not gonna be doing anything but if we want to drink or smoke it’s bring your own stuff but chan said a dealer will be there_

_hanhan: and i hope you told him jeongin and hyunjin are too young for that_

_ilikedark: all of you are too young for that_

_yaknow: uh excuse you if i want to get wasted i will do as i please_

_seungseung: that’s the spirit_

_hyunjinyoung: hyung you’re supposed to be our ride_

>>

“Who wants to come with me after school to look for a new outfit?” Sooyoung sings.

“What’s the occasion?” Yeri asks. 

“We’re going to a party tonight and my closet has been looking a little dull.”

“We?” Tzuyu asks, brow raised. 

“Yes, us! Joohyun unnie invited me and she said I could bring friends!”

“If you drive us, we’ll go. Tzu-tzu could stand to have some fun, maybe even meet someone,” Yeri teases. 

“No!” Sooyoung yells. “No man is good enough for my precious Tzuyu!”

Tzuyu really hopes her face doesn’t betray her, but she can feel herself blushing. If anyone knows anything about her, it’s that she never lies. Ever. About anything. 

Except the fact that she does not and has not and never will be romantically interested in any man. Ever. 

She knows it goes against her very being to be keeping such a big lie, and everytime her friends make off-hand, semi-serious comments about her love life, she wants nothing more than to confess that she already is with someone. 

Someone female, someone beautiful and bubbly who brings a genuine and rare smile out of her. Someone who complains about how tall she is one minute because ‘it shouldn’t be this hard to kiss my girlfriend!’, and then the next is insisting she use her height to reach the hidden snacks in the back of the cabinets.

She knows (hopes) her friends would support her no matter what, but she can’t help the uncertainty that lingers deep inside her.

“I don’t want to meet anyone,” she says. 

‘I already have someone.’

>>

** triple JX3 **

_wang gae: guess who’s getting TURNT tonight_

_park gae: never say the word ‘turnt’ again_

_JB: i second that_

_wang gae: you guys are so mean!!! : < but i’m serious let’s party tonight!!!_

_park gae: where_

_wang gae: Kim Seokjin is having a house party and ya boi is invited!!_

_JB: never say ‘ya boi’ again and how did you even get invited_

_wang gae: YA BOI has connections_

_park gae: it’s that girl you slept with last week isn’t it_

_wang gae: maybe or maybe it’s that GUY i slept with equal rights hyung_

_JB: ??? that doesn’t apply??_

_wang gae: whatever either way i’m invited so you guys are invited so let’s go!!!_

_JB: eh i was kinda just gonna chill with Nora tonight_

_park gae: Nora is a cat Jaebum_

_wang gae: yeah hyung come on get laid, get drunk, smoke something!!!_

_JB: no_

_park gae: yeah jackson remember he’s only loyal to choi ‘proof that god exists’ youngjae_

_JB: shut up i never said that_

_wang gae: c’mon hyung even he is gonna be here and you don’t want anyone to snatch him!!!_

_JB: you’re lying_

_wang gae: no i’m not, ask jinyoung-hyung!!_

_JB: jinyoung??_

_park gae: the fact that you are actually asking me means you do believe he’s gonna be there so congrats you played yourself idiot_

_JB: fuck both of you i’ll be there but pick me up jinyoung i don’t feel like driving_

_park gae: fine but don’t wear one of your ugly-ass hoodies try to look somewhat respectable_

>>

** 4Djisoo **

_park gae: are you and your friends free tonight?_

_4Djisoo: hello to you too oppa and idk i think so why??_

_park gae: bc you, Youngjae, Jimin, and Taehyung are invited to Kim Seokjin’s house party tonight_

_4Djisoo: MCFUXKING LIT OPPA THANK YOU_

_park gae: ...i regret everything you’re worse than Jackson...._

_4Djisoo: hehehe i’m guessing a certain I’m Jaebum will be there too?_

_park gae: yeah that dumbass will be there so make sure Youngjae looks good not that he needs any help his smile is so fucking....bright_

_4Djisoo: i see you’ve fallen for the sunshine as well_

_park gae: not like that_

_4Djisoo: oh no, i know, we all love him trust me_

_park gae: just text me when you get there so we can get these two together already_

_4Djisoo: aye aye captain!_

 

“GUESS WHO JUST GOT ALL OF US INVITED TO KIM MCFREAKIN SEOKJIN’S PARTY TONIGHT?!” Jisoo exclaims, slamming her hands on the desk dramatically. 

“Kim Jisoo, I don’t care who’s house your invited to, sit down and be quiet now!” the teacher yells, scowling. “And put your phone up unless you want me to get your great aunt in here!” 

Jisoo shakes her head, sheepish. “No, no I’m sorry.”

“That’s what I thought,” the teacher mutters, returning to grading more failing papers. They didn’t pay teachers nearly enough to deal with these hyperactive kids.

“So how’d you get us invited?!” Taehyung squeals when hes sure the teacher’s eyes are off them and their huddle of desks in the corner. 

“Yeah, I thought it was an upperclassmen thing only,” Jimin says, looking suspicious. He’s never one to decline free drinks and a free party, but it feels...sudden. 

“Don’t worry about it,” Jisoo beams. “The important thing is we’re all going and we’ll have fun!” 

“I don’t know,” Youngjae frowns. “You know I’m not a very big party person.”

“Lies,” Taehyung scoffs. “I’ve seen you down like five shots in one go and feel nothing.” 

“Yeah, it took like a whole case of beer to get you drunk last year,” Jimin says, remembering that one very memorable camping trip. 

“It’s not my fault none of you can handle your drinks!” Youngjae protests.

“Well, it doesn’t matter because we’re all going!” Jisoo declares, grinning. “I’ll even pick everyone up!” 

“Fine,” Youngjae sighs. “I’m not becoming designated driver if you all get drunk though.”

“I wouldn’t stand by that,” Jimin says. He doesn’t look it, but the chubby-cheeked boy can drink, not as controlled as Youngjae, but getting drunk is the fun part. 

“It’s fine!” Jisoo assures. “I’m inviting my other friends too so they can drive us if anything happens."

>>

** chaehyunjenoo **

_chichoochoo: we going out tonight ladies_

_jenjen: says who_

_chichoochoo: says me!!! party tonight!!_

_chayyyee: uhh i love you unnie but the last party we went you accidentally let all of us eat pot brownies_

_memequeen: that was my first time doing weed_

_chayyyee: yeah you spent like 20min trying to convince me that god is a fish and earth is his fish bowl_

_memequeen: yeah and you kept touching that guys head because you swore it was changing colors_

_jenjen: ....wow...._

_chichoochoo: yeah sorry about that....this time will be better tho it’s at Kim Seokjin’s house and he is like the most respectable human being ever_

_memequeen: oooh ok i’ll go then!!_

_jenjen: yeah fine i will too_

_chayyyee: ooh maybe dahyun will see her mystery girl!!_

_chichoochoo: mystery girl?? hmm what’s this about???_

_jenjen: dahyun flirted with this girl during the food fight_

_chayyyee: it was under a table while we were hiding for our lives! super romantic!_

_memequeen: what can i say ladies im an expert at the art of seduction_

_jenjen: yeah no stop_

_chichoochoo: OOOOH GET IT DAHYUN UNNIE IS PROUD_

_chayyyee: she’s famous too!!!_

_jenjen: famous? you didn’t tell me about that_

_memequeen: she’s the girl from the shy shy shy commercial and she’s even cuter in person i almost fainted!!!_

_chichoochoo: daaang that’s Minatozaki Sana she’s one of the Japanese transfer students_

_jenjen: how do u possibly know everyone and everything_

_chichoochoo: i talk to people? and idk everything i mean i still don’t know who chaeyoungs SECRET GIRLFRIEND is because she won’t tell us_

_memequeen: ohh yeah how many months has it been now??_

_jenjen: almost 6_

_chayyyee: yaaahhh stop trying to guilt trip me!! i told you guys she just isn’t ready to tell people yet, she’s really shy and she isn’t even out to her own friends yet_

_chichoochoo: i know we know sorry but just promise we’ll be the first ones to meet her!_

_chayyyee: i barely have other friends unnie of course you all will be the first ones to meet her_

>>

“So,” Junhui starts. “Who’s driving tonight?” 

“My permit hasn’t come in yet so I’m out,” Chan says. 

“I’m not really going to drink, so I guess I could?” Sana offers. 

“Dino, you’re too young to drink anyways!” Soonyoung says. “Only hyungs and noonas can drink tonight!” 

“There’s no way I’m drinking that gross ass beer and cheap vodka. I’ll drive.” Minghao says, disgusted. He only drinks wine, and everyone knows that, yet here he is about to go to a party that’s probably going to be packed with problematic and rowdy people. 

“Aww, thank you Hao Hao!” Jun squeals. “I know you’d rather sip wine at home alone.”

“If you call me Hao Hao one more time I’m abandoning all of you there.”

“Hao hao hao~!” Jun sings for the millionth time, completely ignoring him. 

Curse Junhui and that insufferable nickname and his flawless god-like face.

“Hyung is blushing again!” Chan points, grinning evilly.

Actually, curse feelings in general. 

>>

** idk what to call this **

_JB: hey i’m just texting to let you guys know there’s a party tonight at Kim Seokjin’s house and that you should come if u want_

_woozi: wowww how nice of you to think of us_

_JB: i can tell that’s you Jihoon wtf does woozi mean_

_woozi: none of ur business and we’ve already been invited so thanks_

_JB: wtf rude who invited you_

_vernon: well seungkwan invited me and hyungwon-hyungs secret lover invited him and so we both invited jihoon-hyung_

_memeking: he’s not a lover we just fuck but yeah he said we can come_

_JB: ohh is it that upperclassmen that no one knows about still_

_vernon: yup i’ve tried guessing but he won’t confirm or deny_

_woozi: it his business who he fucks, as long as he gets us into parties idc_

_JB: wow you only want him for his body_

_woozi: you only want him for his ‘long ass legs’ you kinky weirdo_

_JB: I DO NOT HAVE A LEG KINK WHO EVEN IS THAT WEIRD_

_vernon: there are some strange people out there hyung_

_memeking: how bout we stop talking about me, my legs, and Jaebum’s weird fetishes_

_woozi: agreed i for one am disgusted_

_JB: i regret making this group chat already_

_vernon: hyung why is your name memeking not that i don’t agree but??_

_memeking: bc the internet has dubbed me as such now silence peasant_

_vernon: . _ ._

>>

“Yah, Kihyun, stop it!” Yoongi growls, swatting at the lingering paper. “Where did you even get this?!”

“Somewhere,” Kihyun shrugs, blowing another handful of sparkly confetti into Yoongi’s irritated face. 

“Stop it you fuc-“

“Language!” Minhyuk screeches. “We’re still in class you know!” He reminds, gesturing around them. 

“Nobody gives a fuck, this is just a study period,” Mark says, ignoring Minhyuks dramatic gasp. 

“I’m just trying to keep you guys out of detention,” the brunette huffs. 

“Yeah, control yourself Min Yoongi,” Kihyun smirks. Yoongi and Kihyun have been friends for a while now and he's one of the few people who knows exactly how to get under Yoongi's skin and vice versa.

“That’s actually a good point,” Mark says, before Yoongi can curse at Kihyun again. “They might put you in the same room as Kim Namjoon again.” 

Yoongi scoffs. “Good, then I can beat the fuck out of him and-“

“Oof, how about we avoid that name altogether?” Minhyuk suggests. “Like Voldemort?” 

“Lame,” Kihyun says. This is exactly why Minhyuk and Kihyun can't be in the same room for more than five minutes without yelling at each other, together, or someone else (the others actually find it kind of cute).

“ExCUSE YOU HARRY POTTER IS-“

“ANYWAYS,” Mark yells, trying to defuse the situation (again). “Everyone is coming to Jin-hyungs party tonight, right?” 

“Yup!”

“Yeah, whatever.”

“Imagine if Kim Namjoon showed up,” Kihyun muses.

“I wish he would,” Yoongi scowls. “As if that bastard would ever have the guts to come to Jin-hyungs party.”

“Chill, you definitely need to go and smoke and/or drink something,” Mark observes. “Also, I’ll doubt he would, he knows Jin-hyung hangs out with noona, everyone does.”

“Well let’s hope so,” Minhyuk says. “I don’t want a repeat of that food fight, it’s too soon.”

>>

“Don’t you think it’s too soon to start planning for this?” Woojin asks. 

“What? No! It’s never too early to plan your success!”

“That’s true,” Momo nods. She's been dancing since she was three after all and look where it got her. 

“I know, but what if your friends don’t like me?”

“Trust me, they will!” Chan smiles. “One of them is a SUPER good singer, just like you, I mean all of them can sing obviously but you’ll get along trust me!”

Woojin sighs. “Fine.”

“Good, then you can meet them all tonight at the party!”

“What party?”

“He means the Kim Seokjin house party tonight,” Momo explains.

“Are you coming too noona?!”

Momo shakes her head. “No, I don’t think so.”

“Aah, that’s okay! You should pass by though if you can!”

Woojin nods. “Yeah, we’ll even bring you. But Chan are you sure we should meet there?” 

“Of course, it’ll be fun! Almost the whole school is going!”

A slight exaggeration, but not totally untrue, because unbeknownst to Seokjin and the rest of the ‘golden oldies’, a storm of underclassmen, complicated romance, and mind-altering substances was set to land at that party. 

It was definitely going to be 'fun'.


	6. kiss kiss fall in love

When Bang Chan said almost the whole school was going, he was only slightly exaggerating, but it indeed looked like the whole school was there. 

The house was packed, music blaring, people loitering in small groups outside, smoking and drinking, and god only knows what was happening inside. 

Lucky for Seokjin, his house was an enormous two story building with two bathrooms and several rooms for hookups, (not that he encouraged or approved of it but as long as people stayed out of his and his parents bedroom he didn’t care too much) an enormous back and front yard, and most recently his parents had an in ground pool installed. Kim Seokjin’s house was a party house straight out of a high school rom-com and he loved it, especially because his parents weren’t home half the time. 

And as long as people didn’t trash his house or start fights, he’d continue throwing parties. Granted, he could never be sure of who would show up and who and what they’d bring.

 

>>

 

“Jeonghan, I swear you better not get robbed at this party.”

“That’s why you’re carrying half of my supply noona, no one will ever expect someone like you to be a dealer,” he says, handing Wendy a plastic bag of what was obviously blunts. 

“Someone like me?” 

“Your supplier looks like a golf dad, I think Wendy-noona could be a dealer if she wanted.” 

Jeonghan scoffs. “Seungkwan that’s....actually true...” He turns to Wendy in the passenger seat and smiles sweetly. “Noona, do you want to work with me tonight?”

Wendy rolls her eyes, handing the bag back to him.

“Why are we parked so close? We’re not gonna be able to leave,” Wonwoo frowns.

“Its just in case the cops show up,” Joshua explains. 

“Do you think the cops will show up?” Seungkwan asks, voice shrill.

Jeonghan shakes his head. “I don’t think so, Kim Seokjin is pretty strict about going too wild, but I’m not getting caught with not one ounce of weed if they do. I’m too sexy for prison.” 

“Well let’s hope you sell it all then,” Wendy says. As much as she disapproved of her friends...pastime, she was confident that he was going to pocket a pretty penny tonight. The guy was too damn charming not to.

“Hey, where are Jeongyeon and the rest of them? I thought they were coming too?” Seungkwan asks, looking at the cars around them. There really were a lot of people, the windows of Jeonghan’s car weren’t down but he could hear the faint hum of music from inside the huge house. 

“Jeongyeon-noona and Nayeon-noona are coming together, Seokmin said he’s coming with his ‘97 line friends,” Wonwoo says, exiting the car.

“We’ll see them later on,” Jeonghan says, getting out too. “Right now it’s time to make money.”

 

>>

 

“Oppa!” Jisoo shoves her way through the crow, dragging her friends along with her.

Taehyung and Jimin barely hang on, cheeks already rosy from about 5 cups of some insane alcoholic mixture that’s probably gonna hurt a lot more than humanly possible the next morning. Youngjae however, despite ingesting the same as them, is only slightly buzzed and giggly, but still self aware. 

Which is why when he sees the twin moles, sharp eyes, and familiar handsome frowning face next to Jinyoung and Jackson he yanks Jisoo (and his friends) back, panicked.

“What is Jaebum doing here?!” he screeches, hoping his voice isn’t heard over the booming music. 

Jisoo plays dumb. “Huh?” she says, failing to keep the grin off her face. “Oh, well I mean it’s a party Youngjae, lots of people were invited and he is friends with Jinyoung, who invited us.”

“I’m so proud of you,” Jimin laughs, high-fiving the girl.

“I can’t believe we’re about to get Youngjae laid!” Taehyung slurs, as Youngjae looks absolutely petrified, but is slowly starting to realize he can’t escape. 

So, he accepts his fate. 

“I hate all of you. Get me another drink— actually scratch that — two drinks.”

His friends cheer and Jisoo pushes them forward again. 

‘I’m a really good friend,’ she thinks. 

 

>>

 

** chaehyunjenoo **

 

_memequeen: where is everyone im all alone ; n ;_

_jenjen: that makes two of us jisoo said she was meeting us here but i haven’t seen her_

_memequeen: i know and i lost chaeyoung ; u ;_

_jenjen: literally how_

_memequeen: there are a lot of people unnie!! we were trying to get to the kitchen but we got separated ; - ;_

_jenjen: she’s fine don’t worry we’ll find her just come here first_

_memequeen: where r u?!????_

_jenjen: beer pong table in the garage about to stunt on these kids if they don’t leave me alone_

_memequeen: ooooh i can’t drink for the life of me but i’ll play!! be my partner unnie!!!!_

_jenjen: fine but what about chaeyoung?_

_chayyyee: hey don’t worry i’m in the bathroom i’ll be there soon!!_

_memequeen: yayy!!!!_

 

>>

 

“I can’t believe we’re making out in a bathroom,” Tzuyu says, detaching herself from the other girls lips.

“Well you don’t want to be seen,” Chaeyoung teases, lips pink and slightly swollen. “And besides, I’ve missed you.”

Tzuyu blushes. They’ve been together for almost six months, probably the longest time Tzuyu has spent being so close with anyone, but Chaeyoung still made her flush as easily as when they first met. 

“I’m sorry...”

Chaeyoung hops onto the bathroom counter, trying to even out the dramatic height difference between them. She loves Tzuyu but craning her neck every time they wanted to talk was exhausting.

“Love, it’s okay, really. Coming out is your choice, it doesn’t matter if you want to do it tomorrow or next month or next year because I’m still going to be here.”

Tzuyu’s heart melts as she engulfs Chaeyoung in a hug, burying herself in the girls neck. “Thank you,” she says softly.

Chaeyoung giggles, pushing her away lightly. “You want to thank me?”

“Hm?”

“Keep kissing me.”

 

>>

 

“Shit!” BamBam curses as the cheers erupt around him. 

“I thought you said you were good at this!” Yugyeom cackles, watching Lisa down her fourth cup of beer.

“How do you both suck this much?” Jungkook laughs, sipping his own drink. It’s something fruity, like punch, but it’s not spiked. Luckily, he got to it just before someone dumped an entire bottle of vodka into it. 

“AUSSIE GANG!” Chaeyoung cheers, high-fiving Jennie and Dahyun.

“I’m not even Australian, but sure!” The crowd around them laughs and starts chanting. “Aussie Gang!” 

“Yah, Park Chaeyoung aren’t you supposed to be rooting for your best friend?!” 

“Sorry Lisa, I’m Australian first, human second.”

“You guys really should just give up,” Seokmin laughs, downing his own drink next to Yugyeom.

“Yeah, I’m getting bored,” Jennie smirks. “I haven’t even drank yet.” 

“Hell no!” Lisa says, grinning, despite the fact that the ‘Thai Gang’ was obviously going to lose. “Let’s go BamBam!”

“Fuck yeah!”

 

>>

 

Jaebum doesn’t have very many actual friends, the only two being Jackson who someone forced himself in there, and Jinyoung who’s been his best friend since he could remember. 

But it’s true when they say friends are the only ones who can betray you. In this case, they stab you in the back and leave you to flounder on an ugly couch in front of the cutest boy in the entire galaxy.

“I swear I’m going to kill Jinyoung,” Jaebum mutters, hoping he doesn’t look as nervous as he is.

“N-No!” Youngjae says. “Don’t blame him, it’s my fault that him and Jisoo did-“

“What?” Jaebum cuts him off, a little harsher than he intended. 

Youngjae winces. Fuck. 

“Th-they did it for me, b-because....” Jaebum didn’t know if his heart was going to explode because he felt bad or because he was that smitten. Both probably. Youngjae’s cheeks were tinted pink, from alcohol or embarrassment he didn’t know, and the way he was avoiding Jaebum’s gaze and fidgeting made him feel guilty. 

“I-I’m sorry,” Jaebum stutters, cursing himself for sounding so lame. “I didn’t mean to cut you off I-“

“They did it because I like you!” Youngjae blurts, eyes widening when he realizes what he just did. He is absolutely, completely mortified beyond belief and all he can do is bury his reddening face in his hands and hope he’s lucky enough to get struck by lightning in the next five seconds. 

Jaebum isn’t much better, mouth opening and closing like he has something to say, but nothing comes out except choked noises of confusion and disbelief and suddenly the room feels too small and there are too many people for this and he needs a window to throw himself out of right now. 

“I’m sorry,” Youngjae says, muffled, face still buried in his hands. “J-Just forget about it, I-I’m sorry hyung.” He gets up to leave. 

“N-No!” Jaebum grabs him by the wrist and tugs him back down and Youngjae almost combusts on the spot. “I-I...I like you too...” 

Okay, now Youngjae was going to die. 

Right there. 

In Kim Seokjin’s house. 

On his couch. 

He is going to burst into actual flames because it’s more feasible than the words that just came out of Im Jaebum’s mouth. Im Jaebum’s beautiful mouth that he’s dreamt of kissing over and over and over until it hurts.

“Y-You want to kiss me till it hurts?” Jaebum grins, face still flushed red. 

“W-What?!” Youngjae squeals. “Did I say that out loud?!”

Jaebum nods, thrilled. He inches closer to Youngjae who has all but retreated to the end of the couch.

“Well, come on,” Jaebum smirks. “Kiss me.”

 

>>

 

“Ten bucks says Youngjae chickens out.” Jimin declares, downing another drink in a single gulp as Taehyung nods in agreement. 

“No, if anyone is going to chicken out it’s that dumbass Jaebum.”

“Hmm, ten dollars says both of them chicken out, I mean they’re barely looking at each other!” Jisoo points out. “Hey, where did Jackson oppa go?”

Jinyoung shrugs. “He knows like everyone here, he’ll be fine.”

“Ooh, are we betting on Jaebum-hyung?” Jihoon asks, appearing out of nowhere with Hansol in tow.

“Hey, Jihoon,” Jinyoung grins. “Yeah, we are.” He points to the couch in the corner of the cramped living room.

“Holy crap, is he actually with Choi ‘living embodiment of the sun’ Youngjae?” Hansol gasps dramatically.

“It’s about time.” Jihoon says. “Twenty bucks says Jaebum just straight up runs away though.”

“Oh! Youngjae is leaving!” Jisoo exclaims. 

“Aww, no!” Jimin pouts. “C’mon Youngjae!”

“Oh!” Jinyoung gasps and everyone else does too. “Jaebum stopped him!”

“Wowww, hyung is pretty cool, I’m impressed,” Hansol says, nodding appreciatively.

“I don’t know, sunshine looks like he really wants to run,” Jihoon observes.

“He better not!” Taehyung slurs. “It’s about time he got laid and stops-“

“Oh my god look!” Jisoo squeals, pointing frantically.

“Holy shit,” Jihoon and Jinyoung both say.

“Okay, now I’m really impressed,” Hansol grins.

“Finally!” Taehyung cheers.

“Should they really be doing that all out in the open though?” Jimin laughs. 

“Jiminie, look around, everyone is doing that,” Taehyung says, pointing around them to the other couples kissing and laughing together.

Granted, none of them were full-on making out and practically grinding on each other like Youngjae and Jaebum, but at least Taehyung’s wish for him might finally happen.

Good thing there are plenty of rooms upstairs.


	7. party hard

The way people were avoiding their corner, you’d think they all had the plague or something. They understood upperclassmen were scary, everyone had those thoughts when they were younger, but these kids treated them like they were the freaking mafia or something.

Joohyun, the femme fatale with her chic ‘trophy wife’ Seulgi. Wonho and Shownu, the definition of muscle. Seokjin the seducer, Mark and Yoongi’s cool, composed demeanors. Kihyun’s sharp eyes cutting the very air and Minhyuk with his ever present smile that had people dropping their guard faster than anything. 

It was a bit dramatic, but kind of flattering and slightly true.

Yoongi thought it was dumb though.

“Why do all of these kids look so freaking scared?” he spats, blowing smoke through his nose.

“We’re scary,” Minhyuk says, batting at the smoke. 

Kihyun snorts. “Not you.”

“I’ll have you know I’ve been told by MANY underclassmen that they find me INCREDIBLY intimidating thank you very much.”

“How’d they tell you that if they’re so intimidated?”

Minhyuk sputters and Kihyun smirks. 

“Why don’t you both just smoke and hush,” Mark says, head tilted back as he blew (impressive) rings of smoke into the air. 

Mark Tuan is a pretty chill dude, but an undeniable adrenaline junkie and everyone who knows him can attest to that. He's thrown himself out of more flying things than he can count, somewhat knowingly thrown himself into somewhat perilous situations, but for the most part he's pretty calm. As long as you didn’t anger the guy or act too noisily (Minhyuk, Kim Namjoon, that redhead friend of his), he was the most laidback person in the universe.

“Woah, that's so cool," Seulgi awes from her place next to Joohyun. 

“What, that?” Yoongi scoffs. “Watch this.”

Yoongi takes a hit, breathing in deep as he opens his mouth and breathes out softly. The smoke curls out slowly, like something is steadily burning in his mouth, but it doesn’t hurt and he just lets it out and Seulgi watches the swirling smoke, fascinated.

“It looks like a little ghost or something!” she laughs.

Mark shrugs. "I could do it better.” 

“Ha, if you say so,” Yoongi taunts, and before they know it they’re competing to see who can impress Seulgi the most.

Joohyun wants to tell them to stop being childish, but Seulgi bounces over to them, hypnotized. It doesn’t help that Kihyun and Minhyuk are instigating either, so she just lets them be. 

“I’m too lazy for all that,” Seokjin muses, taking another hit of the precious stash his ‘dealer’ had just brought. He could always count on Jeonghan. 

Hyunwoo makes a face. “I’m not good at smoking, it always hurts." He's more of an alcohol person anyways. 

“You just have to breathe properly,” Hoseok says, although he himself hasn’t smoked anything in a long time, not since he started seriously working out. He may or may not have had a few....complications with a couple of...controlled substances in the past, but that was behind him now. He was in peak physical and mental health nowadays and most importantly; he's happy. 

“Speaking of breathing or whatever,” Seokjin drawls. “When are you gonna tell us who your secret hookup is?”

“That has nothing to do with breathing...”

Joohyun laughs and Hyunwoo decides he’s glad he sticks with alcohol. 

“...So? Tell us anyways.”

“No.”

“I tried.” Seokjin is weird when he smokes. The guy is normally playful, unpredictable, and a little cheesy, but weed always makes him tone down.

“You did,” Joohyun says patting Jin’s shoulder with an awkward laugh.

“Even I don’t know,” Hyunwoo says. “And we’ve been friends since forever.” 

“I’ll tell...someday,” Hoseok assures. “Then maybe you guys will stop trying to follow me around.”

“Hey, that was perfectly valid, we thought you were in trouble!” Jin objects.

He’s referring to Hoseok first ‘secret hookup.’ He‘d been acting suspiciously and at the behest of Seokjin and Minhyuk, the whole group followed him around after school, tailing him like poorly trained spies. They looked so ridiculous, dressed up in cheap wigs and 'perv' jackets that Hoseok wasn't even mad.

That was almost a year ago though and although he’d since changed people, he explained to his friends that it was always casual. He’d be lying if he said that about his current hookup though, who coincidentally had just texted him. He was here. 

“Ooooh Hoseok-hyung just got booty called!” Minhyuk grins. 

“At least he gets called, you don’t even have an ass to begin with.” 

Minhyuk pounces on Kihyun who falls onto an annoyed Yoongi, who in turn annoys Mark. Hoseok takes that as his cue to leave and walks off telling Hyunwoo he’ll he back soon. 

“Can you all just sit down?!” Mark yells. 

“Tell that to Kihyun!” Minhyuk glares, sitting his non-existent ass on top of the grumbling boy and by extension, Yoongi.

“Why don’t both of you get the fuck of me instead?!” Yoongi groans, trying to push them both off his lap. “You’re crushing me!”

“Oh shut up Agust D,” Kihyun spats, sarcastic. “Why don’t you go do a rap battle or something? I’ll call Rap Monster for you and you two can fight again.”

“I would gladly beat his ass if you two would GET OFF.” He pushes them again, but they don’t budge. Kihyun is stuck under Minhyuk and Minhyuk is still butt hurt (pun intended). Mark is just ignoring them and the rest of them are just staring in amusement. 

“Is no one going to help me?!”

“Nope.”

 

>>

 

“Who’s house is this again because oh my god I want it.” 

“Don’t know, don’t care, there’s free drinks, that’s all that matters,” Mingyu slurs. They'd only been there a half-hour, but two beers and a couple dozen shots later and Mingyu was definitely drunk. The pervading smell of weed in the air didn’t help either, is it possible to get a second-hand high?

“Same,” Seungcheol toasts, taking a shot of cheap vodka.

“It’s so nice though, I mean did you see the pool?” Hobi marvels. “And all the rooms?”

They were sitting in the backyard, drinking together (minus Hoseok, he's fine with Sprite, thank you) and truth be told, the place was impressive. The outside alone had a huge back and front yard that anyone was free to inhabit to drink and smoke. The side of the house glowed with the blue and gold lights set up around the whole pool area that was already packed with people swimming and going in and out the house. The first floor was huge and had two different living rooms, and a good sized kitchen that led to the even bigger garage (they’d heard the cheers of what was undoubtedly a game of beer pong when they got there) and that was just the first floor.

"I heard there are like six rooms and two bathrooms on the second floor too," Hoseok says.

“I wouldn’t go in ANY of those rooms if I were you,” Namjoon chuckles, beer bottle in hand. It was his fourth one already, but he needed it. Deserved it after the disastrous end of week he’d had. Stupid Min Yoongi and his bastard friends. 

“Yeah, you don’t know who’s house this is,” Changkyun says, taking a sip of whatever substance his friends had half-forced on him. They said it was Malibu? Mango flavored? He didn’t care for alcohol, really. 

Jooheon laughs. “That’s not what he meant dude.” 

“What else do you mean?”

“Wow, and I thought Mingyu was our maknae.” 

Changkyun frowned. 

“He means there are people hooking up in those rooms,” Seungcheol explains, laughing at Changkyun’s horrified expression. 

“What, why?! That’s so — I mean it’s not even their house — how are you just gonna go and have sex in someone else’s room?!“ 

“Eh, who cares?” Mingyu says, getting up. “I’m look-- gonna look-- for drink something else.”

He disappears into the house, staggering.

“Should someone go with him?” Hoseok asks. Being as he's usually the sober one at these kinds of things, he tends to become a bit of a mom friend.

Seungcheol sighs. “Yeah, probably.”

Namjoon sighs. “I’ll follow him, make sure he doesn’t run into a wall or something."

 

>>

 

“Jeonghannie!”

“Jackson!” Jeonghan winces as Jackson pounces on him, hugging him tightly. He still isn’t used to how touchy the other can be. 

“Did you save me something good?” the other asks, eye brows wiggling. 

“You know I did. You have to let me go though.”

Jackson pouts but releases him anyways. “Fine. Where are all your friends?” 

“Uhh, they're somewhere. They didn't want to sell with me.” He hands an already rolled blunt to Jackson. “By the way go slow with this, my supplier said it’s some new stuff he just got."

“Ooh, thanks!” Jackson grins, already lighting it up. “If you want I can come with you.

“Eh, sure. I don’t have much left, I was just gonna sell the rest to Kim Seokjin again.”

 

>>

 

Minghao isn’t keen on parties. The drinking isn’t a problem (or the ridiculous amount of illegal drugs), the problem is that every time he goes to one of these big blowout parties something always happens. Someone tries selling too much and gets robbed, angry drunks trashing the house, someone tries sucking someone’s dick in the only bathroom, something always happens. 

Regardless, he finds himself here anyways, watching Soonyoung, Junhui, and Sana squeal over how cute the gummy bear shots look. 

“They’re cute but won’t do anything, it only has like a little bit of vodka.”

“And how would you know?” Soonyoung asks, brow raised. 

“Hyung, I’m not a baby I’ve tried them before.” 

“Unacceptable, you’re our maknae!” Sana reprimands. “You can have one today though, they’re so cute!” She holds the tiny cup out to Chan who downs it, confused. 

“Have one too!” Junhui puts one in Minghao’s hand who looks at it with a frown. 

“I don’t like gummy bears.”

“What?! How are we friends?!”

“I drove you here.”

“Oh, yeah.”

 

>>

 

When Jeongyeon and Nayeon arrive they're about an hour late, but they expect things to be in full swing (and they are). What they don't expect though, is to see a certain Japanese transfer student with two boys. 

“Hey!” Jeongyeon greets. “I thought you weren’t coming?” 

Momo smiles and points at the two boys. “These guys convinced me to come.”

“Oh!” Nayeon waves at them. “Hi Chan, Woojin!” She only met Woojin last year, but she's known Chan since they were little.

The two boys wave back.

“Have you guys seen this group of funny-looking kids?” Chan asks, looking around. “They’re really cute, one of them has freckles!”

“No?” Nayeon laughs. “We only just got here too, sorry. We can look with you if you want?”

Woojin smiles. “Yeah thanks noona. We were supposed to meet them a while ago, hopefully they aren’t going too crazy.”

 

>>

 

“Time to get mcfreaking wasted.” Is the first thing Minho says when he walks into Kim Seokjin’s two story party paradise. He heads straight to the table with the spiked punch, completely ignoring the 'kids' he'd been graced with.

“Hyung, you’re still our ride you know,” Jeongin reminds, looking around in wonder. He felt guilty about lying to his parents, but he’d be lying more if he said he wasn’t glad to be at the party. 

The music was loud but not unbearable, there was a big group in the middle dancing. Couches and people were scattered about, smoking, drinking, talking, (hooking up but he’ll ignore that) and everyone was having a good time. This wasn't even counting all the people outside.

As one of the youngest in school, the chances of him and his friends going to a Kim freaking Seokjin party were slim, yet here they are. He’d have to remember to thank Felix for getting them in. 

“Don’t thank me, thank Chan-hyung,” Felix says, voice raised to speak over the music. “He said he’ll meet us here in a bit.”

Jeongin nods, not sure when he’d said that out loud. “Not to be that person, but is there anything non-alcoholic? My parents can smell alcohol a mile away.”

“You better hope they don’t smell weed, because this scent is definitely gonna linger on us,” Changbin says, nose scrunched in distaste. He’s more of a beer guy. 

“It’s okay, we brought a change of clothes just in case we went in the pool,” Hyunjin assures, watching Minho down two cups of punch without flinching.

“You know this stuff is spiked right?” Jisung laughs, sipping his own cup. “Slow down.”

“It’s okay, let him,” Seungmin says as Minho downs yet another cup. “His brother’ll cover for him and Changbin-hyung can drive us home.”

“Bold of you to assume I’ll be sober.”

"Felix, maybe your friend can take us?" Hyunjin offers. They couldn't afford to be stranded.

"Maybe. Let's have fun though."


	8. dun dun DUN

Mingyu is tall as hell, so why does Namjoon have such a hard time keeping track of him? It’s not even been a minute when he goes after the talk drunk but he’d already lost him in the crowd of even drunker, dancing people.

“Mingyu? Where are you?” he calls out, pushing his way through the crowd when someone bumps into him, sending him colliding into the staircase with none other than Kim freaking Seokjin. 

"Goddamit," he hisses to himself. Why would the universe do this to me is what runs through his head before he starts planning his escape. If he’d known Kim— actual model — Seokjin CLOSE FRIENDS with Bae Joohyun and the rest of that crew was here there’s no way in hell he’d have even considered coming to this party. 

“Yah!“ Seokjin yells. “Watch where you’re....going....”

Shit. 

 

>>

 

Wonwoo considers himself a rather intelligent, straightforward person. His head is home to a plethora of random knowledge, he has high marks, and when he wants something he gets it with little to no problem. 

Enter Kim Mingyu, a giant problem (literally). 

He doesn’t know how became so smitten with the clumsy (and sweet and insanely handsome) giant bt he did and for the first time in his life he doesn’t know how to get what he wants. Mingyu is painfully oblivious to Wonwoo’s _very_ obvious flirting, and it’s not because he isn’t gay (Seungkwan and Jeonghan confirmed that for him being the gossips they are), the guy is just that oblivious. 

“Mingyu, do you think you could help hyung with this?”

“Sure hyung, let me show you how so you can learn. It’s really easy,” Mingyu smiles, taking over the stove.

Wonwoo can’t cook like Mingyu (no one can in his opinion), but he isn’t totally inept. That doesn’t stop him from making Mingyu unknowingly show off for him while he gets to be as close to him as much as he wants for ‘teaching purposes.' Jeonghan says that's a cheap, cliched move but Jeonghan hasn't been pining after anyone for almost a whole year so he can suck it.

“See?” Mingyu demonstrates, doing some weird tossing trick with the pan that is a lot more advanced than they’ll ever get in a home economics class. “You just have to move it around a lot.”

“Wow, you're the definition of husband material. The guy you date is going to be _very_ lucky.” At this point, Wonwoo is noticeably pressed against the other and he’s feeling a little bold so he just barely grazes Mingyu’s biceps with the tip of his finger while looking up at him. Their height difference isn't too dramatic but it's enough for Wonwoo to be able to look up at him with his best 'notice me' eyes.

“And you’re so fit and healthy too, you’re perfect.”

Mingyu blushes and he smirks internally, thinking he's finally conveyed that HE wants to be that lucky guy, HE wants to hold hands and kiss and do all that gross couple stuff, him!

Alas, Mingyu is just embarrassed at being praised and goes on to insist that Wonwoo is much better and smarter than him and that he’s surprised Wonwoo isn’t with someone already and says he knows some people.

Wonwoo resists the urge to smack himself with a frying pan.

It’s frustrating and Wonwoo doesn’t know how much more direct he has to be. He’s starting to think Mingyu just isn’t interested and is trying to subtly and nicely (he’s far too nice for his own good sometimes) tell him so. Maybe it's not meant to be but he's been trying at this almost all year, so he can't just give up. He needs a sign and that's exactly what the heavens give him.

A huge sign that says ‘this is your last chance,’ a sign that takes shape in the form of Kim Mingyu himself. A very drunk Kim Mingyu who runs right into him.

“Oh, sorry!”

“Mingyu?”

“Wonwoo? Oops! I meant Wonwoo-hyung.” He giggles. 

“It’s fine, I can tell your drunk.”

“Whaaaat? No I’m not, I’m sober enough to know I should be calling you hyung, hyung! Can I sit down though? I’m tired.” He drops on the couch, groaning dramatically and taking another sip of whatever is in that red cup everyone seems to be in love with tonight. Wonwoo isn't big on alcohol.

“Sure, are you here with your friends? Where are they?” Wonwoo asks, sitting next to him. There’s no way he can leave the kid alone like this, whether he's crushing on him or not. 

Mingyu shrugs. “I don’t know, they’ll find me. I’ll stay with you in the meantime hyung!” He smiles, eyes sleepy but genuine and it's so cute that it gives Wonwoo an idea. A bad, embarrassing idea that Jeonghan would surely tease him about until he died, but this feels like his last chance and he doesn't have that much too lose. Plus, Mingyu is pretty drunk and he might not remember, right?

“Hey, Mingyu.”

“Hmm?”

“Do you know that I really like you?”

 

>>

 

Seokjin really shouldn’t be allowed to smoke anymore. Not after this. 

““Yah!“ Seokjin yells. “Watch where you’re....going....” He falters, and it’s not because he’s recognized the other man like Namjoon is thinking. It’s because suddenly, he’s horny as hell. 

Damn, Seokjin thinks, eyeing the guy in front of him. Seokjin knows he’s handsome, has gotten plenty of compliments and is quite literally the king of self confidence but this guy can _get. It._

Gorgeous, sun-kissed skin and a pair of warm worried brown eyes stared back at him. His eyes travel to luscious lavender hair and Seokjin finds himself fantasizing of pulling and tussling that head of hair all night long.

Sober Kim Seokjin wouldn’t even entertain this thought, because sober and self-aware Seokjin would immediately recognize that this was the guy his friends had all but declared war on....High and careless Kim Seokjin, however, was another story. That Seokjin didn’t recognize anything except that he's hot, this guy is hot and he wanted him in his bed and on him right now. Like right freaking now. 

“My room is upstairs,” is all he says before grabbing the others hand (he groans internally because oh my god he can’t wait to have those hands all over him), running up the staircase, throwing both of them into his bedroom and smashing their lips together without a second thought. 

High Kim Seokjin was about to make a big mistake that sober, unlucky Kim Namjoon would have to pay for.

 

>>

 

“Hey, everyone I’m back,” Jeonghan announces sitting across from the most well-known people in school like he belonged there. 

“Oh, Suga-hyung!” Jackson waves when he sees one of his favorite people.

Yoongi waves at the hyperactive brunette. He’s probably one of the only people allowed to actually call him Suga, and that’s just because he literally couldn’t stop him from doing it even if he wanted to. 

“Hey, Jackson!” Mark greets. “How do you know Yoongi?”

“He helped me make a song!” Jackson explains, squeezing next to Jeonghan. “How do you...”

Jeonghan lets them talk, Jackson will have them captivated soon anyway, there’s always something about the guy that people can’t resist. 

“Where did my favorite customer go?” he asks Joohyun but she ignores him, captivated by Seulgi and whatever their looking at on her phone. There’s no way they’re not dating with that look she’s giving the other girl. 

“He went up to his room for something,” Hyunwoo responds from his spot next to Kihyun and Minhyuk who are arguing (again).

“What do you need him for?” Yoongi frowns. “You already sold to us.”

“I have a blunt or two still and he said I should sell him whatever was left at the end of the night.” 

“He’s had enough, you should probably sell the rest somewhere else,” Mark says. 

“No, it’s fine, you know how Jin-hyung gets. I’ll take you to his room,” Yoongi sighs, getting up. Their friend had a tendency to get catty when he was high.

 

>>

 

“Do you know that I really like you?” 

Mingyu nods, his muddled mind not fully understanding. “I like you a lot too hyung!”

“N-No, not like that,” Wonwoo stutters, cheeks tinted red. “I mean I actually like _like_ you-- Like dating like you."

Wonwoo thinks there’s no way he could be any clearer with what he wants. Mingyu’s answer is either going to be yes, no, or what the fuck and it’s either going to make Wonwoo very happy or make him want to die on the spot and never have feelings again. That’s probably a bit dramatic but actually confessing to someone you like is a brave feat and he blames Joshua for showing so many anime-confession scenes. 

He’s waiting for his answer, but Mingyu is just staring blankly like he didn’t even hear and just as Wonwoo thinks he’s going to respond, someone calls out. “Yah, Mingyu!” 

“Huh? Oh, hyungs!” The drunk giant waves them over. “See? I told you they’d find me Wonwoo-hyung! These are my other hyungs.” He points to them, calling out their names. "That’s Seungcheol-hyung, Hoseok-hyung, Jooheon-hyung, and Changkyun-hyung! This is Wonwoo-hyung, you guys! He just told me he really likes me!” 

“M-Mingyu!” Wonwoo hisses, smacking the other on the arm. 

“Ow! Hyung!” Mingyu pouts. “If you don’t like me anymore I’ll just leave then!” He gets up, still pouting and walks off without looking to see if anyone is following.

Well....that went horribly. The only comforting thing was that Mingyu’s friends looked almost as embarrassed as he felt. 

“I-I’m sorry, Mingyu is really inconsiderate when he’s drunk,” Seungcheol apologizes trying to avoid looking Wonwoo directly. 

“Yeah, don’t listen to him,” Changkyun echoes. 

Wonwoo just nods. He doesn't even know these guys and they just witness him being drunkenly shot down by their friend? If there's an asteroid anywhere nearby feel free to crash into the earth right now, please and thank you.

“Uh, excuse us then!” Hoseok yelps and they scatter, trying to find Mingyu again and leaving Wonwoo there, regretting EVERYTHING.

“Wow....I was watching from over there. That’s rough buddy.”

“Yeah, thanks Josh.”

 

>>

 

Namjoon is a smart person, so when Kim-- high off his ass-- Seokjin drags him up the stairs to HIS ROOM, the horrible reality of what’s really going on sets in. Not only did he come to a party where an entire group of people hated him, but he came to the party that is literally being thrown by what he should (by extension) consider his worst enemy. Granted, he’s never interacted with Kim Seokjin at all so he didn’t have anything against him, but his friend group is against everything Kim Namjoon and that’s all he needs to know to stay the hell away. 

Kim Seokjin is a lot fucking prettier than people give him credit for though. Everyone knows him as ‘Worldwide Handsome’ but it really doesn’t do the guy justice. He’s absolutely gorgeous in person. What he doesn’t understand, however, is why Seokjin is currently straddling him on the nicest (most expensive probably) bed he’s ever felt and kissing him breathless. Shouldn’t he be cursing him, calling for his friends, and kicking him out his fancy house? All these thoughts and more are running through his head (which isn't processing as fast as it should be, shout-out to the alcohol for that) when Seokjin suddenly starts grinding down on him and that's all Namjoon's brain needs to sober up. 

“N-No, no, no, no, no, NO.” He stutters out, pushing Seokjin’s lips off him as gently as he could and stilling the others eager hips. 

“Ugh, what?” Seokjin whines, hips fighting to move. 

“D-Don’t you know who I am? Or better yet forget that, you’re like SUPER high right now I-I can’t do that to someone, especially not you. Your friends would literally kill me more than they already want to!"

Seokjin is annoyed. “I don’t know who you are and I don’t care, what do my friends matter for?”

“D-Dude, do you seriously not — Ah! Shit, wait!” Seokjin is grinding against him again, running his hands under the others shirt, desperate to get this thing started and just when he thinks he’s about to get what he wants, someone else comes to ruin it.

“Hey, Jin-hyung it’s Yoongi and Jeong —Ugh, hyung come on you should’ve at least locked-- Hey, wait what the hell?!"

“Fucking hell,” Namjoon mutters. This week just keeps getting better. 

“Oh, hi Yoongi, Jeonghan,” Seokjin greets, too casual for someone who just caught almost fucking what Yoongi considers to be the worst person ever. 

“H-Hi,” Jeonghan stutters, barely containing his shock and laughter. He's so glad he came to this party, Seungkwan was going to love this.

“Hyung, what the fuck are you doing?!”

 

>>

 

“Hey...so is it okay if I tell my friends about...this?”

“I’m literally about to suck your dick, what the hell.”

Wonho sighs, running a hand through his black locks. “I know, but they just really want to know and I feel guilty not telling, especially to Hyunwoo.”

“So let me get this straight. I’m LITERALLY about to service you RIGHT NOW and not only are you thinking of another guy, you’re thinking about a whole other group of people?”

“...Yes? It's not like that though, I just--"

“Bye." 

“Hyungwon, stop I’m sorry.” He grabs the other by the arm and pulls him gently into his lap. “I’m sorry.”

“You should be,” Hyungwon huffs. He guides Hoseoks hands to his waist, slowly and deliberately moving his hips down. “The only reason I cane to this party was because of your promise from last time.”

“Ah-- I know but Hyungwon, I’m serious. I want to tell them, this is—“

Hyungwon glares, grinding down harder. “Between all your talking and the yelling next door we’re never gonna get to this.”

“Wait, what? Hyungwon stop.” Hoseok grabs the others hips firmly and Hyungwon groans, because he likes the rare display of dominance from the other and because he knows he’s not moving anytime soon. 

“What the fuck, why?” He whines. 

“Did you say next door?”

“Yeah, so?”

“Left or right?”

“What the fu-- I don’t know left? My left. Look, there it is again.” Hoseok pauses and he hears it this time. Muffles shouts and curses coming from the room next to them.

"Why?" Hyungwon asks again, making a face.

“It’s Seokjin’s room is why, no one should ever be in there.” He lets go of Hyungwon and pushes him off gently. “Sorry, I promise we’ll do the thing next time.”

Hyungwon groans, collapsing on the bed. “You better.”

 

>>

 

Mingyu must have some special kind of talent for disappearing because it takes his friends almost thirty minutes to find him. When they do though, he's leaning against the staircase, red cup abandoned and eyes sleepy. The alcohol has worn off and they know it means he's ready to go home.

“Yah, you done running off now?” Seungcheol teases.

Mingyu nods, much more sober than he was before. “Mhm. Where is Namjoon-hyung?”

“He went to look for you but never came back,” Hoseok answers.. 

“We’re looking for him next so we can get out of here already,” Changkyun makes a face at everything around them. He's done with the party, has been done since they got there, really. 

“Yeah, I’m kind of over all this,” Jooheon says, lips pursed. “Can we still eat ramen at the supermarket though? I don't feel like going home yet."

Mingyu nods again. Nice, hot ramen sounds good right now. And sleep. Sleep and food in general.

Wait. 

Food. 

Home economics class.

Wonwoo.

Confessing. To him. 

Jeon Wonwoo confessing to him, Kim Mingyu.

“Oh my god," he groans.

"What's wrong?" Seungcheol is at his side in a second.

“...hyung...Wonwoo hyung said he likes me...I think.”

“Wait, that wasn’t a lie?” Jooheon scoffs, laughing.

“What?” Mingyu is so confused.

“Oh, wow,” Changkyun whistles.

“Wait, what are — how do you guys-“

“You fucked up dude,” Hoseok giggles.

Seungcheol nods. “You really fucked up.”

“What are you-“

“Hey! What is this?” 

Uh oh. Hoseok recognizes that voice and he curses interanlly when he turns around and comes face to face with the bright red head of hair he’ll never forget. 

“Who is that?” Changkyun mutters.

“That’s Mark Tuan,” Jooheon whispers. 

“And that’s Son Hyunwoo,” Seungcheol gestures slightly. “Lee Minhyuk, Yoo Kihyun, Kang Seulgi, and-“

“Bae Joohyun,” Hoseok finishes. 

“I don’t recall you being invited,” she says icily, eyes narrowed. 

“Oh fucking hell,” Mingyu groans again. He’s like two seconds from having a mental breakdown.

“Fucking hell indeed,” Mark grins.

 

>>

 

Yoongi has been friends with Seokjin long enough to know that he doesn’t make the best choices while high or drunk. He’s jumped in pools fully clothed far too many times, bet $120 that he could balance a pencil on his eyelashes, accidentally bought an obscene amount of sex toys once (it was hilarious watching him try to convince his parents it was credit card fraud), and he’s just done so many things that his friends have all learned to never leave him alone. This moment topped it all though. Seokjin has made some pretty bad choices while high but trying to sleep with the enemy is the worst one by far.

“Hyung, what the fuck are you doing?!”

“Playing baseball Yoongi, what does it look like I’m doing?” High Kim Seokjin is also sarcastic Seokjin.

“It looks like you’re about to fuck the dude noona hates, get off already!” He grabs Seokjin roughly.

“Hey!” Namjoon protests, sitting up now and grabbing Seokjin by the wrist. Truth be told, he didn't want to sleep with Kim Seokjin (maybe) but Min Yoongi brings out the worst in him. 

“Get your fucking hands off him,” Yoongi growls, pulling Seokjin’s arm roughly until the other let’s go.

“I don’t mind,” Seokjin shrugs, grinning. Yoongi can practically see all the dirty thoughts manifesting in his hyungs mind about being manhandled by Namjoon but he ignores him and pushes him back into Jeonghan who at this point is just an avid observer. He’s gonna have some major shit to talk in the group chat tomorrow. 

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing coming here?”

Namjoon scoffs. “I can go wherever I want, but trust me _hyung_ if I’d known you and your friends were here I never would have come.”

If anything irritated Yoongi most it was the utter lack of disrespect and arrogance Namjoon possessed. And the feeling of hatred only grew after that food fight. He’d gotten a face full of disgusting soup, so it was time for him to return the favor. 

“Actually, I’m glad you came,” Yoongi says, grinning at Namjoon’s confusion. “I never thanked you for the food the other day.”

Namjoon smirks. “No need, hyung. I hoped you enjoyed it as much as I did.”

“Oh, I did, but it’s time for me to return the favor.” Thank god they aren’t in school because Yoongi swings at him with all his might, taking so much delight in the bruise that he’s sure will form later on. 

Namjoon however, ducks just in time and jabs at Yoongi’s abdomen quickly before sprinting out the door. “Fuck you!” He yells at a doubled over Yoongi before rushing down the stairs.

“Oh, shit!” Jeonghan laughs. “Are you okay Yoongi?”

“Oh my god, Yoongi!” Seokjin runs over but Yoongi pushes him away and dashes out the door almost crashing into the muscle fortress that is Hoseok. 

“Yoongi, wait!” He says, but Yoongi barrels down the stairs, calling out behind him. "If he’s here then his the rest of his shit friends are here too, come on!”

“B-But I'm a pacifist!" Hoseok pouts.

 

>>

 

When Mark tells her that the people she’s literally declared war on are at the party, Seokjin’s party, Joohyun is livid. The one she mainly has a problem with is Kim Namjoon but she lets Yoongi take care of that, taking pleasure in unnerving his friends instead. She isn’t violent by any means (despite her raw instincts telling her it’d be so satisfying to punch one of these kids in the face), she just wants to convey to these idiots to never mess with her, Seulgi, or her friends again. And her cold, stoic face is the perfect way to do that. 

Seulgi thinks its silly how people are afraid of her but that's because the only looks she gets from Joohyun are those of complete infatuation and marvel. Her other looks are reserved for people that bother her, like these.

“Oh fucking hell,” the tallest of them groans. She recognizes him from a couple of magazine spreads and makes a mental note to not so subtly threaten to tarnish his modeling reputation. That’s probably nothing to others but the boy would understand. As a model herself, she knew just how easily gossip about a models attitude and associations affected their career. 

“Fucking hell indeed,” Mark grins next to her. She may not be violent but he sure had no problem getting his hands dirty. The guy was chill but even he needed outlet every once in a while. 

“Again, I don’t recall any of you being invited, so why are you here?” She repeats. 

“We didn’t know it was your party,” one of then mutters, a black haired guy wearing a hoodie. 

“Speak up.”

“We didn’t know this was your party,” another days, louder, handsome face set. He was obviously trying to assure the others but Joohyun could see his long (surprisingly pretty) eyelashes fluttering nervously.

“We wouldn’t have come if we knew it was your party, trust us,” the blonde says, small slanted eyes worried. 

“Actually it’s Jin-hyungs party,” Mark says, stepping closer to Hoseok. “You still weren’t invited though.”

Hoseok is insanely uncomfortable and he knows they have to leave like right now. The vibe coming off from this guy screamed 'bad news.' “Fine, we’re sorry. We’ll leave now then, just let us get our friend.”

“Friend?” Joohyun raises a brow, unsympathetic. "You better not mean--"

“KIM NAMJOON!” 

Hoseok jumps a foot in the air (he’s not good with surprises) and good for him because the next thing he knows Namjoon comes falling down the stairs with none other than Min Yoongi. Halfway down the long stairs, Yoongi tackled the other, sending them both barreling down the stairs together. They roll down while screaming and grunting and cursing, making everyone take a step back when they land at the foot of the staircase and start beating on each other.

“Namjoon!”

“Dude stop!”

“Fuck yeah, Yoongi!”

“Unnie, stop them!”

“Oh, shit a fight!” someone yells, and suddenly they have a whole crowd around them screaming and jeering and throwing things all over the place, music still blaring, just adding to the mayhem. So much for not trashing Seokjin’s house. Speaking of...

“THAT IS MAHOGANY!” Seokjin screeches as he rushes down the stairs just in time to see blood. "YOU TWO STOP THAT RIGHT NOW MY FUCKING FLOOR IS--!"

Jeonghan is right behind him, cackling and relishing in his literal front row seat to this shit show. “Holy crap, that’s gotta hurt!” He yells when he hears a loud smack.

“Oh, damn,” Hyungwon shows up, whistling as he looks over Hoseoks (massive) shoulders. “I thought you were checking on this.”

“I was!” Hoseok grimaces at a particularly hard punch on Namjoon. Or maybe it’s Yoongi, he can’t tell he’s trying to look away. “Yoongi wanted me to help but I don’t hurt people!”

Hyungwon snorts. “Duh, you're too nice." Hoseok may be massive and muscly but the only scary thing about him is how big his heart is. "These muscles are just for show you--- Hey, wait is that...Is that the cops?"

As (mostly) underage teenagers doing very illegal things, each one has developed a very special type of selected hearing that detects one thing above all else; Police sirens.

Jin curses. This was great, this was just fucking perfect!

"Thanks for coming to the party!" He screeches. "Everybody out, NOW!"


	9. yEET

Nothing disperses a party faster than the arrival of cops. Even before Seokjin yells at everyone to get the hell out his house, people are already moving and pushing their way out. It's absolute chaos.

 

>>

 

If they were going to have to run for their lives, Jeongin would have never come to this party.....Is what he would've said if he was a reasonable person. Maybe it was the ever-present smell of weed all around him or just plain teenage stupidity, but he'd be lying if he said this wasn't at least a little bit fun. As a kid who'd lived a relatively sheltered, normal life the prospect was of being caught and arrested was terrifying but also (dare he say) a little bit exciting. His hyungs would HIGHLY disagree though.

"Jeongin, Hyunjin, grab my hand!" Seungmin yells, grabbing onto them. The crowd is massive and it's taking everything in their small group to hold onto each other against the pushing and pulling going on all around them.

"Felix, grab them!" Changbin instructs. "Where's Jisung and Minho-hyung?"

"Right here!" Jisung calls out waving one hand in Minho's and the other in Seungmin's. They're in a single line now, hands linked together like preschoolers trying to stay with the group at a field trip.

"Uh, hyung we're going to need a ride and preferably not in the back of a police car," Hyunjin calls out. The sirens are definitely getting closer and louder and it was sending everyone in the house even more into panic.

Changbin curses. He's had like three beers and there was no way he'd feel okay about driving. "We're going to have to leave Minho's car here and hope it doesn't get tagged or something."

"I parked like a whole street down, we're good," Minho yells from his place in the back of their makeshift chain. "And by the way, I'm drunk as hell."

"We know," they all sigh but they can't be mad at him. Their Minho-hyung works really hard, he deserves to let loose every once in a while. Unfortunately for them it had to be tonight, but Jeongin has an idea.

"Felix, your friend, call him!" He says.

"Oh, yeah! I know where his car is, he texted me earlier, come on!" Hands still linked, they move as one, pushing against the crowd. Hopefully Chan hasn't left yet.

 

>>

 

"Move your skinny ass Yugyeom, I'm not about to go to jail again!"

"Mall jail doesn't count dumbass," Yugyeom spats. "And stop pushing me, you're the one who wanted to come see this stupid fight!"

"Because I value quality entertainment you fucking--"

"Oh my god please shut up," Jihyo pleads.

"And stop pushing, someone is going to get trampled," Mina adds, distressed. 

At BamBam's lovely insistence, they'd abandoned the beer pong game and moved to the main house to hear what all the commotion was about. It was a pretty good fight, definitely some interesting people involved if it got the attention of the whole party but police sirens have the ability to put a major damper on any (illegal) party. Maybe it was the possibility of being arrested.

"Man, it sucks you guys got here right when all this went down," Lisa observes. 

"Yeah, you should've seen Lisa and BamBam completely flopping at beer pong!" Chaeyoung laughs.

"How are you two so calm?! You were drunk like three seconds ago Lisa!" Jungkook says, frantic. He's never been quite good with crowds and crazy situations and this definitely wasn't making it better. That and the possibility of dying in jail. 

"Oh, I'm just getting ready to accept my fate because my mom is going to literally kill me before the police can even process me."

"Same," Chaeyoung echoes and they both look off into the distance like they can see their own dismal future.

Seokmin groans next to them. Somehow they'd all managed to stay in one big circle but it didn't make this any less stressful. "I should've known any party Jeonghan invites me to is going to turn out like this."

"At least he never disappoints," BamBam shrugs. "Look, we're getting closer!" He points to the front door that's slowly coming into view. He didn't realize just how many people were here until he was lumped with all of them.

"Okay, when we get out everyone just fucking run to your car!"

 

>>

 

This was both the best and worst party Jaebum has ever been to.

Best because he'd finally gotten to feel the softest lips, plushest thighs, and reincarnation of the sun, Choi Youngjae. Worst because right as he was going to suggest they find someplace more private, all hell breaks loose. They didn't get up to see the fight but they didn't need to, they could hear it and the screams around it and then suddenly the police sirens that sounded a little too close for comfort.

He doesn't even have time to think about getting out of there with Youngjae when the other is being dragged off of him by his panicked friends and before he can even protest, he's being dragged off by an agitated Jinyoung.

"Come on, we have to get out of here!" 

"W-Wait, hold on! Youngjae!" He calls out to the other boy but it's too late. Youngjae and his friends are sucked into the crowd immediately. He almost runs after them but Jinyoung for whatever godforsaken reason is actually going in the opposite direction and TOWARDS the fight.

"What the hell Jinyoung, I thought you said we were getting out of here!"

"Aren't you forgetting someone?" Jinyoung spats.

Oh, shit. Jackson.

 

>>

 

Jackson is the definition of a social butterfly. He loves meeting new people, talking to them and getting to know who they really are. It's a good quality, especially since he's considering a future in the entertainment industry where connections can come sometimes come in handy. The only possible downside to his lovely personality is that someone as friendly as him can become friends even with shady, problematic people.

Like Yoon Jeonghan. Now, Jeonghan wasn't shady or problematic per se (he is a drug dealer though), but Jaebum and Jinyoung have always worried that his various friendships would get him involved in things he didn't need to be involved in. Jackson hated to admit that they were right.

All he wanted to do was hang out and smoke, first with Jeonghan and then with Mark and his friends. The upperclassmen were cool, kinda weird, but funny and Jackson was having a good time clinging to Mark before everyone started acting cold.

Next thing he knows, he's seconds away from witnessing Mark and Jung Hoseok throw down and he doesn't know what to do because his newfound friendship with Mark is clashing with his occasional acquaintance-ship with Hoseok. It's silly, he knows, but Jackson is very loyal and he doesn't want to see a fight between these two good people just because of some misunderstanding. He's seconds away from mediating when an even bigger mess comes tumbling down the stairs in a tangle of limbs, landing right in front of them and just start swinging at each other on the floor.

Yoongi is on top of Namjoon pounding on him, but Namjoon is bigger and he resists, getting in some punches of his own and Jackson's not the one being hurt, but his heart clenches.

Kim Namjoon is his friend, they get together every once in a while and create music, eat together, and just talk. Yoongi is one of his favorite hyungs, the guy has helped him through so many musical funks and he feels so happy every time he gets to call him his sugar hyung. He doesn't know what to do, so he just stands there, cursing his loyal and delicate heart until someone yells out something that makes his heart race even faster.

"It's the cops!"

"Motherfucker!" Kim Seokjin screeches from where he is on the stairs. "Everybody out!"

Suddenly, everyone is running and pushing and yelling and before Jackson can even think, he's pushed backwards and lands on his savior.

"Watch where you're going you little-- Wait, Jackson is that you? Oh, thank god let's go!" Jinyoung grabs his hand, and he briefly registers a scowling Jaebum with them before they're both dragged to the back exit by Jinyoung.

The rest is a bit of a blur. Jinyoung brings them out into the backyard and tells them to follow him before sprinting across the backyard. They're all in shape and healthy, but the entire situation is stressful and they find themselves panting the whole way. Jackson however, finds himself laughing and he doesn't even know why. They're running and running towards the street behind Kim Seokjins house and Jackson is just cackling and giggling the whole way.

"Why are you laughing?" Jaebum glares, panting.

"I don't know!" Jackson shouts, trying to keep up with Jinyoung and control his laughter. "I have no fucking clue!"

They reach the car soon enough and they waste no time piling in, Jackson throwing himself into the backseat just as Jinyoung warns them about seatbelts before taking off. It's silent in the car for a few minutes (minus their panting), the feeling of adrenaline still fresh in their veins. Jinyoung drives them carefully through the suburban areas, making sure to avoid the busy and lively Friday night streets. It isn't until they're far enough that the sirens have faded that they finally relax.

Jaebum chuckles from the front seat and Jinyoung just sighs heavily. Tonight has been BEYOND stressful but Jackson lets out a small laugh again. Then another and another until Jaebum does too. They keep going, exchanging giggles and snickering until suddenly they're both bursting into laughter and even Jinyoung can't fight the grin on his face.

"Oh, my god that was such a shit show."

"You're telling me?" Jackson laughs. "I was RIGHT THERE hyung. Icould've DIED."

Jaebum scoffs, but the smile never leaves his face. "Don't be dramatic. If anyone suffered tonight it was me."

It's Jacksons turn to scoff now. "Pfft! How?"

"Because," Jinyoung grins. "Jisoo and I cock-blocked him."

"Yeah, you did asshole," Jaebum punches his friend (softly).

"Next time I'll make sure to leave you to be arrested then dumbass."

"Shut up, I--"

"Wait, what are you guys talking about?" Jackson sits up eagerly.

"Seatbelt!" Jinyoung reprimands, glaring at him through the rear view. "I'm not telling you without it."

"Whoops, we can always count on you for safety hyung!" Jackson smiles, buckling his seatbelt. "Now, tell meeee!!"

"Well Jackson, if you must know our very own dumbass Jaebum finally got with his elusive sunshine."

Jaebum would punch Jinyoung again if he was busy cringing at the unholy squeal Jackson just let out.

"Oh, my god tell me everything!" The boy insists. "Tell me EVERY SINGLE DETAIL HYUNG!!!"

"There's not much to tell," Jaebum smirks. "He said he liked me and then that was it."

"Bullshit," Jinyoung scoffs, laughing. "You were freaking out when we left you with him, you two barely looked at each other for the first five minutes."

"J-Jinyoung!" Jaebum stutters, blushing and wincing at Jacksons obnoxious cackling. "Why were you watching?!"

"I had to make sure you wouldn't blow it! You were like two seconds from running away and so was he! There was no way Jisoo and I were going to let either of you ruin our hard work."

Jackson squeals again, moving forward in his seat to coo at them. "Awww, Jinyoung that's so sweet!"

"Sh-Shut up Jackson I'm trying to drive." He stutters, but even with the dim lighting around them the red tint of his cheeks is evident.

"Yeah, shut up Jackson." Jaebum echoes, also blushing. 

Jackson grins because he loves teasing them, the legendary JJ Project. They're so cute and OBVIOUSLY soulmates. "So did you get his number?"

Jaebum curses, barely realizing his mistake. "Oh, my fucking-- No, I didn't have time THANKS TO SOMEONE." He looks at Jinyoung pointedly, who doesn't seem bothered. 

"Don't look at me like that, here." He hands his phone over to Jaebum, eyes still on the road in front of them. "I have his number."

"W-What, how?!"

"Because I think of everything, now shut up look for his number."

"Aww, Jinyoung!" Jackson squeals for the millionth time. "I don't care what people say, you're a sweet person."

"Shush," Jinyoung mumbles, blushing again. He knows.

 

>>

 

"Wait! What about Momo?!"

"She's going home with Nayeon and Jeongyeon-noona!"

"Oh my god, you know Hirai Momo?"

"Not a good time right now Jisung," Minho spats. "Ow! Your elbow is digging into my ribs!"

"Well, you and Hyunjin are crushing me!" The boy whines.

"You're the one pushing me!" Hyunjin retorts.

"You guys are going to knock Jeongin off, stop it!" Seungmin yells, grabbing onto their maknae.

"I swear if you fall on us..."

"Then tell them to stop moving!" Jeongin pleads.

"It's not his fault hyung," Felix sighs.

"This wouldn't have happened if you didn't drink Minho!" Changbin groans.

"You drank too though hyung," Felix points out, wincing as everyone adjusts again and someone ends up kicking him.

"Who's side are you on Felix?!"

"Obviously he's on my side--!"

The whole backseat dissolves into a storm of yelling and cursing as everyone complains about their spots and blames each other. The good news is they found Chan and his car. The bad news is the car is only built for five people and they have NINE. They were already at a super illegal party doing very illegal things though, so why not just keep the law-breaking going?

Chan was in the drivers seat with Woojin next to him, both anxious to take off. The backseat is meant for three people but Minho, Jisung, Hyunjin, and Seungmin are squeezed in together like a bunch of sardines. Felix and Changbin were crammed at their feet trying to curl up into something comfortable but it's impossible with everyone kicking and moving every two seconds. Then Jeongin, their poor maknae, was laid across his hyungs lap on his back and praying not to go rolling off. It was like human Tetris and they were undoubtedly failing.

"Could you all shut up?!" Woojin hisses and they quiet down to grumbles. "Chan, just go already!"

"Shit, okay everyone hold on and hide as much as you can!"

"You should leave through the street behind us and then go through there instead of the main roads!" Minho advises (yells) from where he's being crushed against the window as Chan books it.

"Thanks, that's actually a good idea."

The police hasn't gotten there yet but it's only a matter of time. The sirens are getting closer and closer, it's making him anxious and the frantic cars around him aren't helping. Minho's advice is right though, almost everyone will be trying to leave using the main road and then go onto the highway where most of the cops will actually be coming from. It was longer to leave through the back streets, but it was definitely safer and a lot more inconspicuous, there wasn't anyone on that route.

When they are far away enough that the sirens have faded, everyone let's out a collective sigh of relief.

"So..." Felix starts. "Anyone up for some ramen?"

Woojin would honestly rather go home at this point, but Chan just laughs and changes course. "Why not? My treat!"

The backseat erupts into cheers and thanks you's, the tension of the night finally dissolving.

"So this is who you want to start a group with?" Woojin whispers when the others are occupied talking about types of ramen they want.

Chan nods, grinning. "I already have an idea of what we'll do for the summer showcase! We're definitely gonna win!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if this is lame but its 2am and I'm trying axfjdsfjsk


	10. yEET pt 2

Seungkwan never imagined he'd be betrayed by his friends of all people. Jeonghan assured him the cops wouldn't come and although Seungkwan doesn't drink (he can't handle it very well) or smoke (that stuff smells awful), he knows the police would still bring him in. Just being at the party is enough of a crime so when he hears the sirens, he panics. 

He was looking for something (non-alcoholic) to drink when the fight breaks out so he's immediately screwed because everyone else panics too. They're suddenly storm the doors, sweeping everything along with them, including him.

"Hey, stop what the — Ow! Don't push!" he whines, but no one pays him any attention. It's survival of the fittest right now and the crowd doesn't hesitate to push and pull him all over before spitting him out. He stumbles, almost crying when he falls at someone's feet. 

"Hey, are you-- Oh my god, Seungkwan?! Are you okay?"

"Vernonnie!" He stands, hugging his best friend in relief. "You said you weren't coming!"

"I wasn't but Jihoon-hyung and I had this bet and--"

"As touching as this is why we have to leave like right fucking now before we all get thrown in jail!" Jihoon cuts them off.

"Oh, Woozi-hyung!" Seungkwan recognizes the other from all the times Vernon dragged him along to their hangouts. 

Jihoon bristles. Seungkwan knows that's not his real name but he doesn't bother correcting because they've got even bigger problems. "Yeah, hi whatever. We need to leave Vernon. Like now."

"Can I come with you?!" Seungkwan pleads. He can't imagine staying in this place any longer. "I don't know where my ride is!" 

"Yes, I don't care let's just leave!" Jihoon spats but he's just stressed. He can't exactly afford (or would like) to be arrested at such a young age. It could ruin his career. "Let's go through the garage, it's faster!"

They rush into the garage and Jihoon is right. There's no one there, everyone is at the front and side entrances, so they thank their luck and dash to the car that's parked just a few feet away.

"Good thing you parked close," Vernon notes, throwing himself into the passenger seat.

"Yeah but now we have to beat the rest of these idiots out and--"

"Hyung!" Seungkwan yells from the back seat. He points behind them and Jihoon's blood runs cold.

The sirens are undoubtedly getting louder and now he can actually see the police car approaching in his rear view mirror. Okay, they _definitely_ need to leave now.

"Shit, shit, shit! We have to get out of here."

"Hyung," Vernon gulps. Things just got a lot realer and he doesn't even want to imagine what life'll be like if he actually gets arrested. 

Everyone around them seems to be having the same panicked thoughts though and Jihoon curses again at the other cars that are moving out recklessly. They're going to cause a fucking wreck, is what they're going to do and then everyone is gonna be screwed.

"Oh my god, why isn't this guy moving?!" Seungkwan screeches at the guy in front of them. He jumps up, pushing Jihoon to honk the horn at the idiot in front of them. "Move already!"

"Sit down!" Jihoon spats, but it works. The guy in front of them is actually moving and Jihoon wastes no time in following him out just as the police car approaches behind them.

Vernon gulps again because this is it, he thinks. He's going to get arrested, handcuffed in the back of an actual honest-to-God police car and be fucking arraigned or whatever the crime TV shows call it and his sister is going to be disappointed in him and his parents are going to hate him. He's ready to screw his eyes shut and surrender but the car just ignores them and keeps speeding foward until he reaches the front lawn and parks and there are two others that follow it.

"Go, go!" Him and Seungkwan yell, desperate to leave now.

"I am!" Jihoon yells back and they rush past everyone, driving at an alarming (but slightly impressive) speed until Jihoon is absolutely sure that no one is following them and there are no sirens that sound too close. There's a beat of silence in the car as everyone watches behind them until the flashing lights are far enough that they aren't a threat. 

"I'm never coming to another Kim Seokjin party ever again, I don't care how rich that guy is," Jihoon sighs. Fuck parties if that's what they're gonna be like, Kim Seokjin was supposed to throw the best ones. 

Vernon nods. Yeah, they definitely aren't doing this again any time soon. He turns back to his friend. "You okay Seungkwan?"

"Y-Yeah, sure n-no not really," the other breathes out and Vernon can tell he's still shaken up. His knee is bouncing rapidly and he's rubbing and wringing his hands, breathing uneven and tears welling in his eyes. Luckily, Vernon knows his friend and exactly how to help him wind down from something like this.

"Hyung, can we play some music?" He asks.

Yeah, I don't care," Jihoon nods.

He connects his phone to Jihoon's car (bluetooth, Jihoon paid a lot for it) and chooses a song he knows will ease Seungkwan and appeal to his hyung too.

_I know you're somewhere out there_

He sings, smiling gently at Seungkwan.

_Somewhere far away_

He nudges Jihoon. "C'mon hyung I know you love this song."

Jihoon can't even deny that Bruno Mars has been his idol lately, so he follows along and sings.

_I want you back,  
I want you back _

Jihoon's voice is the softest, most delicate thing Seungkwan has ever heard and the sweet notes flowing from his lips heal his heart immediately. His entire being feels like it's wrapped in a warm, fuzzy blanket and before he knows it, he's stopped shaking.

_my neighbors think I'm crazy, but they don't understand_  
you're all I have  
you're all i have 

"Come on Seungkwan. Sing." Vernon prompts him.

Seungkwan can't resist and graces them with his heavenly voice.

_at night when the stars light up my room_  
i sit by myself  
talking to the moon  
tryna get to you  
in hopes you're on the other side  
talking to me too  
oh, am i a fool who sits alone  
talking to the moon? 

Soon, all three of them are singing softly and swaying gently, exhilaration and anxiety fading into the night with the sirens.

 

>>

 

Unfortunately, not everyone was lucky enough to get out as quickly as Seungkwan.

"Where is she?!"

"I don't know! Maybe she's still in the bathroom?!"

"Well we have to find her, she needs to drive!"

"I can drive too you know!" Yeri huffs as she pushes and struggles against the crowd.

"Absolutely not!" Sooyoung screeches. "Tzuyu is more careful and besides, we can't leave without her!"

"Fine!" Yeri groans but she knows it's true. She's not really THAT bad at driving but she's had two too many accidents for her unnie to trust her behind the wheel. 

Sooyoung had picked them both up and brought them to the party but the plan was for Tzuyu to drive back. Their unnie was planning on having a drink or two and she did not play with drinking and driving. The moment they arrived though, Tzuyu broke off, claiming she needed to use the restroom and the other two girls hadn't noticed she wasn't back until the fight broke out.

The fight. Ugh. Sooyoung was NOT about the trauma and drama, she just came to have a good time. As soon as that stupidity started, that was her cue to leave. Right as she was going for Tzuyu though, everything blew up. You wanna freak out badly behaved teenagers? Police sirens'll do it real good because before she knew it, everyone around them is in a frenzy. They're all pushing and yanking others around and they knock her phone out of her hand and she barely manages to pick it up without getting her head knocked off too. Luckily, Yeri was still holding on to her. 

They cling even more to each other as they push and move against the crowd until they can reach the bathroom.

"Tzuyu?" Yeri calls out and wretches the door open, coming face-to-face with Tzuyu but she's not alone.

She's kissing.

Tzuyu is KISSING.

Tzuyu is KISSING another girl.

"YOU'RE A LESBIAN?!"

 

>>

 

As soon as Minghao hears that a nasty fight is breaking out, he rounds up his friends to leave immediately because it's starting. He knew this would happen, fucking knew this would happen and partly blames himself. He knew he shouldn't have trusted a party thrown by Kim Seokjin. No matter how rich and respectable the guy is, he's also friends with some pretty bothersome people in Minghao's opinion.

Minghao is ready to leave, car keys in hand and eyes on his friends when the sirens start and everyone loses their mind. His group is near the kitchen when the crowd just pushes itself forward and they're thrown back, far from where they need to be. He's about to yell at Soonyoung for convincing them to come here in the first place when Sana points out there's a side entrance and that it'd be easier to just jump the fence and run to the car since it is parked at the house next door.

"Jump a fence?!" Minghao almost screeches.

Sana nods, looking too pleased at the prospect of (technically) breaking and entering on someone else's property.

"I mean unless you want us to get arrested..." Junhui muses and Minghao resists the urge to curse because he knows they're right. There's no way they're getting through the crowd blocking the door, they'll be trapped and arrested before half of them make it out.

"I think we'd make a good prison gang, don't you think?"

"But I'll be alone at a women's prison Soonyoung!"

Chan scoffs. "That's like paradise for you noona." Sana could pick up a girl during the actual apocalypse, jail was nothing.

"Can we just leave already?" Minghao yells, exasperated. The sirens are getting closer and only _his_ friends would argue about prison life when they could ACTUALLY get arrested.

The side entrance isn't too far but they still have to push through the crowd a little sp Minghao urges them to move quickly. Chan was right about one thing though. Sana could indeed pick up any girl at any time, including right now.

Only Sana would recognize one of the only girls who'd ever made her blush in a crowd of a billion frantic people and when she does, she rushes the girl and her friend over.

"They're coming with us~!" She declares.

"Oh, you remember me then?" The other girl grins. 

"Of course! How could I forget a cutie like you?" Sana grins.

Chan whistles from the back, impressed with his noona's forwardness but the other girl doesn't miss a beat.

"If I'm cute, then you're absolutely adorable." She smiles, all teeth and twinkling eyes.

Minghao has to admit he's impressed, they all are. Usually it's Sana flustering other people with her shameless, over-the-top flirting but this girl just might have her beat.

"Stop flirting!" the girls friend hisses.

"Oops, sorry unnie," she giggles.

"Can we leave now?! Please!" Minghao interrupts, realizing again that the sirens sound a lot closer than they need to be. God, these people.

"Oh, yeah let's go!" Jun says and they surge forward once more.

"Come with me if you want to live," Sana smiles, holding her hand out to the girl.

"Hmm, I don't know are you trying to--?"

"Oh, my god," the girls friend groans again. "Dahyun, I swear if you don't move right now I'm going to abandon you here and tell your mom about the time we--"

"I'm sorry! I'm moving unnie, I'm moving!" Dahyun reaches for the outstretched hand and they march forward.

Dahyun, Sana muses. It's fitting for a cutie like her. 

 

>>

 

Chaeyoung isn't an anxious person. Contrary to how her and Tzuyu appear, it's actually her girlfriend who is the worrier and over-thinker while Chaeyoung has more of a 'winging it' style when it comes to things. She's a calm, fun person who doesn't really panic but even she has to admit that this situation is stressful.

In retrospect, they probably should have locked the bathroom door, not made out in the only bathroom on that floor, and how they didn't hear all the commotion is beyond her. She's gonna chalk it up to a classic case of 'caught in the moment'.

They made it out but Chaeyoung finds herself half-wishing that she and Tzuyu had gotten arrested because sitting in jail is probably a lot more comfortable than sitting in the backseat of Park Sooyeong's car in awkward silence for the last ten minutes.

"So..." Yeri starts, finally breaking the tension. "You're gay..." She looks at them through the rear view mirror. Sooyeong decided at the last minute that maybe Yeri should drive because they certainly have a lot to talk about with Tzuyu.

Tzuyu nods slowly and Chaeyoung's heart almost breaks. She can see the tears glistening in her girlfriends eyes, the way her lip quivers and she doesn't know what to do. She clutches her hand tightly, trying to soothe her.

"Oh my god, Tzuyu are you crying?" Sooyeong shuffles around in her purse for a tissue.

Tzuyu just nods again, and Chaeyoung thanks the other girl for the tissue, wiping her girlfriends eyes gently. "It's okay," she whispers.

Yeri stops suddenly, pulling into a nearby gas station. "What's wrong Tzuyu? You know we aren't mad...right?"

"Why did you stop the car...?" Tzuyu sniffles, head down and hiding her face.

"Because we cant talk if I'm driving."

"Tzuyu, we're a little bit sad you didn't tell us, but we aren't mad at all, really!" Sooyeong assures, eyes gentle. "Why didn't you tell us though?"

Tzuyu just sniffles again, looking down at her and Chaeyoungs intertwined hands. Her throat feels impossibly tight and when she tries to speak out, nothing comes out. She wants to cry, sob even harder because this sucks. She can't even explain herself to her two of the best friends she has and she feels so guilty.

Chaeyoung speaks for her.

"She was just scared," she explains, sadly. "She didn't want to lie, but she was just scared you wouldn't see her the same way or that maybe you wouldn't accept her..."

"Oh, Tzuyu.." Sooyeong is sniffling now too.

"It's my fault," Chaeyoung sighs. "I told her about how when I came out to my friends at my old school and how they....they just didn't take it well. But she got scared because of that, I'm sorry. We're sorry."

Tzuyu nods again, eyes blurry with tears and swollen.

"You have nothing to be sorry for!" Yeri insists. "It's a perfectly valid reason and I promise we aren't mad or upset or anything. We understand it can be hard."

"I'm just happy you have someone who might actually be worthy of you," Sooyeong adds, smiling and she reaches for Tzuyu's other hand. "Unnie is just happy that you're happy."

Chaeyoung blushes but smiles gratefully and releases Tzuyu so she can hug her friends. This was a rather unexpected (slightly weird) way of coming out but Chaeyoung is just glad it went well for her girlfriend. Tzuyu had stressed and hurt about it for so long, she deserved to feel accepted now.

"Yah, Chaeyoung-ssi come hug too!" Sooyeong chides.

Chaeyoung laughs, shaking her head. "No thank you, it looks a bit uncomfortable."

"It is," Yeri says, pushing herself away. Her and Sooyeong being in the front seat and Tzuyu having to stretch from the backseat was not the ideal hugging situation but it was still a nice moment. "Chaeyoung, please tell us how you met Tzu-Tzu."

"Tzu-tzu?!"

"Or Zoom Zoom!" Sooyeong adds.

"Zoom Zoom?! Babe, why didn't you tell me about this?!" Chaeyoung laughs, practically snorting.

Tzuyu ignores her, turning to the other two instead. "Please stop." 

"Never," Yeri counters. "By the way...You know Sooyoung-unnie is bisexual, right?"

Tzuyu's eyes widen. "W-What?"

"Yup!" Sooyoung says proudly. "There are too many sexy people in this world for me not to flirt with all of them!"


	11. yEET pt 3

"Do you think Chan and Woojin got out okay?"

Momo nods abssentmindedly, more entertained with the chain around her neck. It's silver and a gift from a scouting agency. "Chan texted me a little bit ago. They're at the supermarket eating ramen with the kids he was looking for."

"Who are those kids?" Jeongyeon asks, eyes trained on the road.

They'd managed to escape the house quickly. Funny enough, they'd only just arrived when the commotion went down so when Nayeon saw people running _away_ from the house, she phoned it in before they even parked the car.

"If it's the kids I've heard of then they're a pretty talented group," Nayeon says.

"I don't know about them," Momo frowns. "I've just been helping Chan choreograph and I only met Woojin a month ago."

"Well, whatever at least they got out okay," Jeongyeon sighs.

"Oh my god, speaking of, did you see those people that were jumping the fence?!" Nayeon laughs.

 

>>

 

As soon as they get to the fence, Soonyoung shouts out his plan. "Jun, you're the tallest, hoist everyone up and then we'll pull you up!"

"What?! Why me? Minghao is tall too!" The other whines. 

"Hyung is too skinny, his arms will snap," Dino explains, running behind Sana to dodge a hit from from his hyung.

"Your neck is what gonna snap."

Sana is cackling and the rest of them are arguing about who lifts who when Jennie calls out to them, exasperated.

"There are plenty of foot holds," she says, already climbing up. "And it's not that tall." 

It's really not and she's right. It's not a slick wooden fence like they feared but none of them really have experience jumping any kind of fence, much less under the circumstances they were in right now. 

Except Dahyun apparently, who has somehow teleported to the top and jumped down, landing perfectly. Ten out of ten form. 

"See you guys on the other side!" She says and then turns to Sana with a grin. "And I'll see you on Monday."

Jennie rolls her eyes as she joins the girl on the other side and they run off together, Dahyun still grinning back at Sana the whole way.

"Okay, so that was pretty gay and kind of cute, but we still have to leave!" Soonyoung reminds them. "Here, I'll hoist everyone up!"

"If you're lifting then let's go!" Jun says, already moving but it's not that easy. 

None of them are out of shape at all but Jennie and Dahyun made it look so much easier than it was. Minghao's elbow briefly ends up in someone's face somehow, Jun almost busts his ass, and Soonyoung makes them promise to buy him his favorite scented hand-sanitizer as he hoists them over. They manage to make it over though and run to the car in record time.

"I'm done with parties," Minghao vows. "Seriously."

"That's fine," Chan says. "At least we'll have the splinters to commemorate this."

 

>>

 

>>

 

The first thing Jeonghan does when he hears the sirens is throw every incriminating thing on him straight to the floor and run, money be damned. He can't exactly spend any if he's in jail. He does check his pocket for what he already has though. There's no reason to take a total loss tonight. Even before Seokjin yells at everyone to get out though, Jeonghan is already leaping over the railing and executing his escape plan.

It's not like he expects to get caught but he'd be pretty dumb not to plan in advance. He's smart enough to know everyone will storm the front door, so unlike the rest of the party-goers, he dashes through the side entrance. Years of experience (not really) have taught him how to slither in and out of places he's not supposed to be.

"You guys better be there already," he mutters as he makes his way to the car and sure enough, he sees his friends there, waiting anxiously.

All except one.

"Where the hell is Seungkwan?!"

Joshua shrugs, worried. "I don't know! He said he was going to get a drink but then the fight broke out and--!"

"I'm sure he's fine," Wendy assures, but her voice cracks.

"Yeah, I'm sure he'll be out any moment now!" Wonwoo echoes, pointing to where people were flooding out the front door as fast as possible but the air around them is doubtful.

This is bad. This is really fucking bad. Seungkwan is just a kid. Jeonghan had assured him nothing would happen and Seungkwan had trusted him and now the poor guy was probably alone and freaking out.

"Shit," he says, running a frazzled hand through his hair. "We'll wait for him in the car then, get in!"

They pile into the car again, none of them feeling any better. Seungkwan is younger than all of them, much younger. Even if it's just by a couple of years, as his 'elders' they should've watched out for him. He seems like a funny, dramatic kid but they all knew Seungkwan was easily stressed out, especially with wild things like this. They stay though, even when every muscle in Jeonghan's body is screaming at him to ditch before the sirens get too close, but he can't. He might be an asshole (sometimes) with questionable morals, but never when it comes to his friends, especially a good kid like Seungkwan.

Thirty seconds pass.

People are rushing out the house, but none of them is Seungkwan.

A minute and cars are pulling out the driveway frantically.

A minute and a half, but there's still nothing except the flash of sirens in his rear view.

Jeonghan pounds on the steering wheel, screaming. "Where the fuck is he?! We have to leave like right now!"

"I don't know..." Joshua says, solemn.

Wendy groans. "Dammit Jeonghan! I swear if-- Ah!" She jumps, shrieking at Wonwoo's ringtone.

"It's Seungkwan!"

"Answer!" The rest of them yell at him and he does.

"Seungkwan, are you okay?!"

Jeonghan grips the steering wheel, knuckles going white as he hears Seungkwan's frantic voice on the other line.

"Well?!"

"He has a ride, go! Go, Jeonghan go!"

"Oh thank god," Joshua gasps.

Wendy lets out a heavy sigh. "Okay good we can-- Ah, Jeonghan!"

Seungkwan being safe was all he needed, so Jeonghan floors it immediately, catching everyone by surprise.

"Seatbelts!" He yells just in time and they're gone.

 

>>

 

"Unnie, you know you don't have to do so much about all this. I'm honestly over it. I was over it like the day it happened."

"I kind of wish you'd told me that before I literally told Yoongi we were declaring war." Joohyun groans, collapsing into the the bundle of covers and wrapping herself up.

"You look like a worm," Seulgi giggles. "You have so many blankets."

They're at Joohyun's house. The moment she heard those sirens, she knew it was time to go. She gave a quick yell to her friends about being safe, grabbed Seulgi, and ran. They left through the back and didn't bother looking back.

That probably seems cold but she knows her friends. They've all had _plenty_ of practice in the getaway department, so much that they should probably examine their lives a little. Nevertheless, she believes in them and hopes they ran like hell because none of them could really afford to be arrested. 

"I'm a taco," Joohyun declares but she frowns. "I'm serious though, I don't think Yoongi is backing down, especially not after tonight."

That whole ordeal with Kim Namjoon was completely unexpected. She knew Yoongi had a temper but she didn't think they'd all have to witness him tumbling down the staircase, locked in a brawl with Namjoon. Seokjin had always made it clear to everyone, his friends included, that he didn't tolerate fighting and drama in his house but it seems Yoongi didn't get the memo or didn't care. 

The way she sees it, there's no going back. Monday ought to be _quite_ interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoiler alert; There's going to be a yEET Part 4 because when I wrote this out it was LONG and I'm trying to cut down a little bit. Thank you to everyone sticking around to read this crack show though asfjkvjida


	12. yEET pt 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the last part of everybody yeeting the fuck on outta that house i promise

Yoongi had always cursed his father for throwing him into boxing lessons when he was young. The old man always told him he was too shy, that he needed to be strong but Yoongi ignored him and quit after just two months.

If only his old man could see him now. Tussling on the (mahogany, we know Jin) floor, drawing blood from his worst enemy with a vengeance. It was a pretty wild Friday night (even for him), so what could possibly make it better if not cops?

Luckily, Mark wasn't as hopped up on adrenaline as Yoongi. He had enough sense to immediately pull his friend off of Namjoon when everyone around them started freaking out and scattering. Mark was probably one of the best dudes Yoongi knew. 

He had his scary moments but for the most part, Mark was very calm and quiet. He was also a really nice guy. Too nice, considering the crisis they were in. 

"Sorry but who the fuck are you again?" Yoongi practically spats but he doesn't mean to sound rude. His head just fucking hurts from being banged on the freaking stair and to be fair, he really didn't know this guy. 

"Ch-Choi Youngjae," the boy responds and Yoongi can't help but feel a bit guilty about his tone because this guy looks genuinely distressed.

"Chill Yoongi, he's friends with Jackson," Mark chides from the drivers seat.

Mark had a strict friend code which consisted of if a friend of a friend needed some help, why not help? If his guy told him the person was nice enough, why not? And in the case of Choi Youngjae, all his instincts were telling him was just that this kid was desperate not to get arrested. So yeah, Mark helped him out. He's friends with Jackson and he usually associates with good people anyway. 

"Sorry," Yoongi grumbles, wincing as he stretches his arm. "Fucking Kim Namjoon." 

Mark snickers. "Jin-hyung isn't happy about his house." They were all definitely getting call about that tomorrow. 

"Does it look like I give a single fuck about mahogany flooring? I'm not-- Ah, shit!" Yoongi curses when his arm makes a painful cracking sound.

"Oh my god, are you okay?!" Youngjae digs into his pockets for tissues (Jisoo is a klutz so he always carries them around just in case). He leans forward with the little pack and starts dabbing at Yoongi's bloody lip like it's the cause of all his pain.

Yoongi stiffens but he let's the brunette continue. "I'm fine. I just hope that bastard is worse." 

 

>>

 

Namjoon wasn't _that_ much worse but he certainly wasn't sitting pretty in the backseat of Seungcheols car. Two seconds after they heard the sirens, his friends yanked him from under Yoongi and ran like hell while Changkyun yelled at them for insisting on coming to the party in the first place.

"Changkyun says we owe him ramen and that he'll be waiting at the gas station near his house."

Hoseok sighs from the backseat, exhausted. "Honestly I could use some ramen. And a burger. And maybe some ice cream." It's been a stressful night.

"Tell him we'll be there in about...six minutes. And tell him to stop texting while driving," Seungcheol adds with a frown. Only Seungcheol would insist on 'fathering' at this moment but he had a point.

Mingyu nods and relays the message. "It's not him texting it's Jooheon."

"And exactly how are we going to walk in there smelling like weed and me all bloody?" Namjoon asks, pointing to his split lip and bruised face. There was no point in running from the cops at the party if they were just going to end up being busted five minutes later at some other place. 

"No one will care," Seungcheol assures. "It's almost one in the morning anyways."

Hosek nods. "Yeah, one time Mingyu went to the gas station at like three in the morning in pajamas, bought three jumbo energy drink, and a PARTY size bag of chips. The cashier barely noticed him. 

"Mingyu what the fuck?" Namjoon laughs but he groans because Min Yoongi apparently bruised his rib cage and it hurts to even laugh. Bastard.

"It was a dark time," Mingyu muses.

 

>>

 

Kihyun and Mihyuk have a strange dynamic. They're loud and they're _very_ opinionated. You can't leave them alone in a room for more than a minute or else they'll start: 

a. cackling like maniacs

b. bickering _somewhat_ playfully 

c. plotting against each other 

or worse of all, d. plotting together 

That being said, they're actually the best of friends who know that when shit hits the fan they can always count one each other and so can the rest of their friends. 

"I still can't believe you pushed that guy down." Hoseok sound guilty.

Kihyun however, shrugs, cool as ever. "It was either he gets arrest or we get arrested. Sorry, not sorry."

"That is if we don't get pulled over and get a DUI," Shownu adds, chuckling. 

"Hey, I'm very much sober!" Minhyuk protests. " I drank the punch _before_ it was spiked and I was only _around_ the weed, I didn't actually smoke it."

"I still feel bad about that guy though," Hoseok insists, frowning. 

"Trust me hyung, don't. I knew exactly who I was pushing and he deserves to get arrested."

"Yeah, he's a cocaine dealer," Minhyuk says. "He's not very friendly."

"Cocaine dealers aside, does anyone know if everyone else got out all right?" Hyunwoo asks, checking his phone for the millionth time. No ones texted yet and he's worried, I mean they were illegally drinking after all. Not to mention the weed. And the noise. And that fight. Maybe him and his friends should cool it with the partying. 

"I'm almost positive Noona and Seulgi got out okay," Hoseok says. "They were one of the first ones out. I'm not sure about Seokjin though..."

"Oh, he'll be okay," Kihyun assures. "It's not the first time he's had to explain to the cops or his parents how one of their houses end up trashed."

Minhyuk almost swerves like he really is drunk. 

"Wait, ONE OF HIS HOUSES?!" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was super short i'm sorry jskjskjsf i swear the next chapter will be better


	13. motherfreaking hecking goddamn FUCK

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!! STREAM SPRING BY PARK BOM !!!
> 
> It's what my queen deserves and more~!!! <3

"We didn't sleep together, right?" Is the first thing Hyungwon hears when he (reluctantly) wakes up.

"God, no," he groans, shoving his face farther into the pillows. This room is too fancy to be letting this much light in. "Ugh, what time is it?"

"Almost ten."

Hyungwon groans even louder because it's Saturday morning and he's pretty sure he has an appointment with some magazine (again) but he honestly can't be bothered with moving.

"You can go back to sleep if you want," Seokjin offers like he can read the others mind. "I could use the company today, there's no way I can talk to any of my friends yet. I don't think they're very happy with me after last night." He's not sure whether or not Yoongi has told the rest of them about his disastrous near hook-up with Kim Namjoon but even if he hasn't, Seokjin knows he can't keep this a secret forever.

Hyungwon peeks from under the pillow to give Seokjin his trademark judgmental stare. "I'm not all that thrilled with you either."

"Excuse you?! I'm the one who saved us from getting arrested last night! Also, I'm older than you!" Hyungwon can't even deny that. He'd made the horrible mistake of Ubering to the damn party, there was no way he was getting out of there. Thanks to Seokjin though, he did.

"Not before you interrogated me though," Hyungwon huffs. 

"It's my house, I have a right to know who's sexing it up my bedrooms you know."

"Touché.....just don't mess with Hoseok-hyung too much about it. I'd already told him we weren't allowed to tell anyone." The secret was out, but only to Seokjin and Hyungwon intended to keep it that way. He's not embarassed or anything, he just prefers the privacy and...intimacy that he has with Hoseok.

"Too late."

Hyungwon shoots up, matted hair sticking up every which way. "W-What?! When did you-- HOW did you-?!"

"I'm kidding!" Seokjin laughs. "It's barely ten they're all probably still hungover asleep from last night."

Hyungwon groans (again) in relief, slouching back underneath his pillow. The massive king sized bed was the plushiest, comfiest thing he'd ever had the honor of sleeping on. The whole room was amazing, Seokjin had an eye for decoration, really. 

"Speaking of last night, what did you do about the cops? And your house-- what are you gonna do about your house hyung?"

"Oh, I had a real good story this time."

>>

 

_"Motherfreaking hecking goddamn FUCK!" Seokjin yells when he realizes everyone has all but dashed out the house, leaving him with one massive fucking problem._

_Two if you count the fact that he has to keep Hyungwon from being arrested too if he wants to hear what juicy secrets the other boy promised to share after all this. But he has to make sure they don't both end up behidn bars harmonizing to shitty harmonica music like some 2000's coming-of-age movie. Luckily, this isn't Seokjin's first (or second, or third for that matter) rodeo, so before the cops are even at the door-step, he dashes out the back door and runs to his car where Hyungwon is anxiously waiting._

_"Can we leave now?!" The other is understandably frazzled, not everyone has experience like Kim Seokjin after all. Hehe._

_Seokjin shakes his head. "No, I have a plan. Move, I'm driving."_

_"What the fuck why are we going back to the house?!" Hyungwon protests when he sees Jin has drove them to the front yard._

_"And what are you spraying?!"_

_"Its for the weed smell, duh. I don't look high though, right?" Seokjin leans forward dramatically, eyes bulging and clothes reeking of some obnoxiously expensive perfume._

_"No, ugh. You just reek of cologne," the other says, disgusted._

_"Good. Now wait here and do NOT move."_

_Lying to the cops probably isn't the best thing to do, but desperate times, desperate measures right? He can't afford to have his parents on his back again after that last party disaster....That one ended with a stolen billboard and an angry mini-pig farmer (don't ask), so he certainly didn't need this one to end up with him arrested._

_So, he lies._

_It was a good lie though and it worked because he somehow managed to convince the police that he had lost the key to their second house weeks ago and had no idea someone found it and used it to trash the house. He wasn't aware until he got a call from his neighbor about the noise._

_"I'm really sorry for the trouble officers, I know you guys have better things to do than deal with some teenage shenanigans." First rule of crafting a good lie? Always add a bit that embarrasses you, it makes people empathize._

_"Well, just make sure you contact your parents about the damages," one of them says._

_"Yeah and if I were you I'd probably change the locks and install a security system or something," the other advises._

_Seokjin nods, trying his best not to look shocked that he actually pulled this off. Not only was he not going to get in trouble with the law, but best of all he was going to get to hear all those secrets Hyungwon had promised. Priorities, people._

 

>>

 

"Wow, must be nice to have a house dedicated solely to parties," Hyungwon whistles. "Lucky you."

"My parents are the lucky ones. It's their house, not mine. I had to copy they keys without them knowing." He's never thought of his wealth as HIS wealth because it's really not. It's his parents. It's their hardwork and jobs that created it. 

"What's this house for then?"

"This is our actual house like the one we live in and stuff."

Hyungwon does a double take. "Wait a minute, what're you gonna do about the other house?"

"My parents come back from their trip on Monday so I guess I'll just have to clean it all before that," Seokjin sighs. He was out of luck there. There was no way he could ask the cleaning staff to help without them alerting his parents. After the first couple of party mishaps they were instructed to report any suspicious activity and/or requests to his parents.

"....I could help if you want." Hyungwon offers. It was the least he could do, really.

"Really?" Jin looks up expectantly. "Oh my god, you have no idea how much I'd appreciate that!"

"Yeah whatever," Hyungwon mumbles. "I mean you did help me not die in jail."

"Yes, I did," Seokjin says, proud of himself. "Let's just hope no one else got into big trouble." 

 

>>

 

**everything before 1998 was a mistake**

 

_chris: none of u kiddos are probably up but did everyone get home okay???_

_woojin: chan wtf it's 10am_

_fixitfelix: I'm up and I did my parents drank a whole bottle of wine and knocked out way before i even got there_

_seungseung: lucky you i had to climb through the window like a cliche teen romcom_

_hyunjinyoung: what does everyone have against rom coms????_

_I.N: yeah we're watching one now and it's not that bad_

_fixitfelix: we?? you're together??_

_I.N: yeah after you dropped us all off at Changbin-hyungs house Jisung-hyung walked home but hyungs brother told us we should stay the night because he could still smell the party on us_

_woojin: and your parents didn't care???_

_hyunjinyoung: they like Changbin-hyungs brother he's good with parents_

_hanhan: good morning everyone why wasn't i invited to the early morning romcom marathon and woojin-hyung your name is boring it's just your name :c_

_woojin: so is chan's_

_chris: correction only my mom calls me chris and actually she doesn't even call me chris she yells at me and says things like christopher stop blowing bubbles in the hallway or christopher you're the reason i have angina whatever that is_

_seungseung: ....you sound like a great son_

_fixitfelix: suddenly i realize why parents down entire bottles of alcohol_

_hanhan: uh ok parental problems aside, hyunjin jeongin i'm on my way and woojin-hyung change your naaammmeeeee_

_woojin: fine_

** woojin changed their name to: honeybear**

_honeybear: is that better?_

_hyunjinyoung: yeah it sounds cute uwu i think i'm gonna change my name too_

** hyunjinyoung changed their name to: hyunjinnie  **

_seungseung: hmm I'm gonna change too_

** seungseung changed their name to: dandiestboy **

_hyunjinnie: oooh that's cute hehe_

_I.N: Jisung-hyung don't make any noise when you come Changbin-hyung is still knocked out and his brother says he's grumpy in the mornings_

_hanhan: speaking of grumpy wheres minho-hyung?_

_chris: oooh dat boi dead_

_fixitfelix: WHAT_

_dandiestboy: he's KIDDING FELIX OBVIOUSLY_

_hyunjinnie: or is he bc tbh hyung drank the most last night_

_I.N: i've never seen someone drink that much that quickly_

_honeybear: not to get off topic but why is everything before 1998 a mistake_

_chris: yeah i take offense :(((((_

_hanhan: oh that was grumpys idea sort of_

_I.N: since minho-hyung was born in 1998 everything before that was a mistake_

_hyunjinnie: and everything after depending on his mood and who he's talking about_

_dandiestboy: if it's about jisung then it's a definitely a mistake if it's about felix then it's mostly ok_

_fixitfelix: maybe we can change it to '97 since chan and woojin-hyung are both '97 liners?_

_ya know: i think the fuck not sir_

_hyunjinnie: good morning minho-hyung~!_

_I.N: good morning hyung_

_hanhan: yOU SUMMONED IT_

_chris: i take OFFENSE SIR_

_honeybear: yeah ditto_

_chris: the hyungs are in the house now boiiisss_

_kendobear: hyung singular i'm older than you_

_chris: BY LIKE A COUPLE MONTHS IT BARELY COUNTS_

** fixitfelix changed the chat name to: everything before 1997 was a mistake **

_yaknow: i thought you were maybe my son but turns out you're just a snake_

 

>>

 

** '97 ftw **

 

_lalalalisa: ya girl is grounded but alive praise the lordt, rosie is grounded and only like half dead so she can't use her phone_

_doubleb: #thaigang lives!!!! i'm not grounded tho_

_gyeommie: same no one was even home when i got there_

_kookie: lucky you i had to promise my brother i'd do all the laundry for a MONTH for him to sneak me back in_

_actualgoddess: mina spent the night at my house so we're good, she's still asleep_

_chris: my mom yelled at me for smelling like beer but she didn't smell the weed thank god_

_dokyeom: well you were barely there before everything happened anyways_

_chris: i was there enough to see some people jumping the fence tryna escape tho lmao_

_gyu: good morning everyone and yeah i saw that too it was so funny_

_the8: fuck all of u_

_doubleb: what rude_

_gyeommie: we didn't even do anything this time_

_lalalalisa: hao :(_

_gyu: oh my god wait a minute_

_dokyeom: minghao dont tell me that was you and jun-hyung_

_gyu: I THOUGHT ONE OF YOU LOOKED FAMILIAR_

_doubleb: sorry not sorry that's fucking hilarious omg_

_actualgoddess: yeah sorry minghao but i can't believe you of all people would be out here jumping fences_

_gyeommie: i'm dead hahaha_

_lalalalisa: lol i mean at least you got away right?_

_the8: again fuck all of you i hate parties_

_dokyeom: after last night me too kind of....especially after what Jeonghan-hyung told me..._

_doubleb: i SMELL TEA_

_actualgoddess: what is it with seokmin having the best tea lately_

_lalalalisa: i for one am proud of him_

_gyeommie: same_

_chris: yeah he's doing the '97 liners proud_

_kookie: just spill it_

_dokyeom: well....it kinda involved you again mingyu and i'm sure you kind of know already...._

_actualgoddess: oooh plot twist_

_gyu: fuck me_

_doubleb: damn mingyu AGAIN????_

_the8: honestly mingyu wtf dude_

_gyeommie: so who's gonna tell us mingyu or seokmin??_

_gyu: i may as well tell it....seokmin can correct me if anything is wrong bc tbh even i don't have the full story really_

 

>>

 

** spill the tea or i spill your guts **

 

_angelordevil: guess who's about to spill the tea of the CENTURY_

_boobitch: oooh is it about last night?_

_jeongyaaass: omg spill you fool nayeon and i barely got there before everything went to shit_

_dokyeom: yeah me and the other '97 liners almost got trampled trying to get out_

_bunnyeon: i'm just glad we got out quickly and no one got arrested_

_boobitch: oh god don't even mention getting arrested i swear i almost had a panic attack when i couldn't find a ride_

_wendy: you gave US a heart attack_

_josh: yeah i honest to god thought we were going to get arrested_

_wowoo: who did you end up riding with anyways?_

_boobitch: vernonnie <3 he came with jihoon-hyung _

_angelordevil: seungkwan i love you and i'm glad you got home safe and i'm also sorry you had a near anxiety attack and again love you <3 but mayhaps can we get back to THE TEA _

_boobitch: love you too hyung <3 AND YES _

_wonwoo: yeah spill if you say it's the best of the century you must have something good_

_bunnyeon: yeah i'm actually kinda curious_

_angelordevil: ok so you know how bae joohyun's whole group DOES NOT like Kim Namjoon or his friends at all right?_

_wendy: yeah_

_dokyeom: yeah mingyu is still freaked about all that_

_angelordevil: well he's right to be especially after the shit show i witnessed last night_

_jeongyaaass: stop just tell us what happened_

_josh: yeah i'm actually interested_

_angelordevil: well you know how i sell to Kim Seokjin when he throws parties right? well i went to give him whatever i had left and min yoongi led me up to his room and y'all_

_angelordevil: YALL_

_angelordevil: YALL I SWEAR_

_boobitch: WHAT JUST SPIT IT OUT_

_angelordevil: Y'all...i walked in...and fucking saw...Kim actual Namjoon and Kim literal Seokjin about to FUCK_

_wendy: ._._

_dokyeom: oh wow_

_jeongyaaass: bROOOO_

_josh: damn im kinda shook_

_bunnyeon: yikes_

_woowoo: that's some pretty good tea_

_boobitch: pretty good? this shit is SCALDING HYUNG_

_angelordevil: oh no it gets BETTER_

_josh: ooh_

_angelordevil: so we walk in and min yoongi is literally losing his shit yelling at seokjin and he's literally about to FIGHT namjoon like i don't fight, you guys know that i'm an asshole sometimes but i DO NOT fight ever but i swear these suckers were about to T H R O W D O W N_

_dokyeom: oh my god is that the fight everyone was talking about???_

_wendy: omg probably_

_angelordevil: indeed it is my friends, Namjoon ran out but Yoongi literally TACKLED him down the stairs and when Seokjin, me, and some other people upstairs got down they were already beating the FUCK out of each other but i was dead as fuck Seokjin was screaming about mahogany flooring or some thing can you believe it?_

_jeongyaaass: i can officially say i'm pretty mcfucking sHoOK_

_woowoo: same here bc just wow_

_wendy: there's never a dull moment in our lives is there_

_bunnyeon: suddenly i'm glad we didn't get caught up in all of that_

_boobitch: speak for yourself id have LOVED a front row seat to that trainwreck_

_josh: same kind of the most interesting thing that happened for me that night was watching Wonwoo's train wreck of a confession_

_boobitch: W H A T_

_angelordevil: shua i thought we were FRIENDS WHY DIDNT YOU TELL ME ABOUT THIS_

_dokyeom: omg hyung was it with mingyu?!?!_

_woowoo: joshua jisoo hong shut the fuck up and no seokmin_

_jeongyaaass: omg he's lying joshua keep talking_

_bunnyeon: yeah sorry wonwoo but this sounds good_

_wendy: i'm sure it wasn't that bad_

_josh: do i tell them or do you want to wonwoo?_

_angelordevil: ooh that bad huh_

_woowoo: i hate all of you but fine yes i tried to tell that idiot mingyu i liked him but he was so drunk off his ass he had no idea what i ACTUALLY meant and went and told all his friends that i LIKE LIKE HIM and honestly at this point i'm ready to be lowered into my grave just put me out of my misery bc i am done and dead_

_wendy: .___._

_bunnyeon: ...wow_

_jeongyaaass: that's rough buddy_

_boobitch: it's always the pretty ones_

_dokyeom: sorry hyung :/_

_josh: yeah it was worse to watch somehow_

_angelordevil: on the bright side at least he doesn't remember and you got some good tea today???_

 

>>

 

**min yoongi is a bastard**

 

_gyu: good morning i want to die_

_joohoney: mood changkyun still isn't up and i'm starving_

_rapmon: try not being able to even laugh i swear if one of my fucking ribs is broken_

_coups: namjoon-hyung maybe you should see a doctor and jooheon im pretty sure mingyu wants to die for a different reason_

_hobi: oh it's bc of the Wonwoo disaster isn't it also good morning everyone_

_joohoney: good morning hyung and actually you're right or maybe it's bc of that whole Bae Joohyun Min Yoongi thing_

_coups: i think the joohyun yoongi thing is more of a Namjoon thing no?_

_hobi: actually maybe it's both_

_gyu: the worst you are all the worst_

_joohoney: ah yeah it's probably both_

_rapmon: at least you didn't actually get hurt???_

_gyu: i literally still want to DIE you guys know we have school on MONDAY right like we have to go back and see ALL those people again_

_gyu: and actually forget about Bae Joohyun and Min Yoongi WHAT AM I GONNA DO ABOUT WONWOO I HAVE CLASS WITH HIM_

_joohoney: i can feel you wringing your hair from over here so pls chill first_

_hobi: i mean do you like him?_

_coups: yeah if you like him just go out with him and try to start over or something i mean at least you'll have a funny story about how you got together_

_rapmon: and if you don't like him just pretend you're secretly an addict with alcohol problems and ask him to keep it on the down low he likes you so he'll probably feel bad and do it problem solved sons_

_gyu: first of all that sounds strangely specific hyung do we have to talk??? and second i'm going with everyone elses plan because maybe i sort of kind of a tiny bit might possibly like him_

_joohoney: gaaaaaaayyyyyy_

_coups: jooheon you literally are a gay_

_hobi: correction he's bisexual and he's taken in spirit by a certain someone remember_

_joohoney: i hate you guys DELETE ALL OF THIS RIGHT NOW_

_rapmon: you know it won't delete off his phone right?_

_joohoney: you're all lucky he's still asleep_

_gyu: you're over here telling me to chill why don't you just confess aren't you two like best friends?!?!??_

_joohoney: i already told you guys it's complicated can we talk about something else now i'm deleting all this off Changkyuns phone now so say something to make it look natural_

_rapmon: min yoongi is an insufferable piece of shit_


End file.
